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bioshock: elizabeth dewitt

[ closed ] fluorescent announcements beat their wings overhead

Who: Miles and Elizabeth
When: the 16th...ish
Where: Elizabeth and Lara's room
What: Miles comes to check on Elizabeth after her date with Ivan, and then some other unexpected feelings happen
Warnings: emotions.........

Since Ivan told him about the barely mitigated disaster their date had turned into, Miles has been understandably concerned about Elizabeth. She must be alright by now, he's sure, but even so, even just from the few vague comments Ivan had made, Miles is still worried. Whatever it was, whatever confusion or flashback she'd had, it had to be related to one of the awful things that happened in her all too recent past.

Even if it wasn't -- Miles would still be worried about her. They haven't really spoken much recently, no real reason in particular, although he's been feeling a little shy in her company even since -- what was it, Christmas? Christmas, right. Dancing with her had been truly exhilarating, it'd been fun, and it'd been painful to keep his feelings to himself. They're still there -- they haven't faded in the slightest -- but he's figured out something Ivan hasn't. Ivan is having feelings for Elizabeth -- very real feelings, more than Miles has ever seen on him before. Ordinarily a date like what had happened with Elizabeth would've sent him running in the opposite direction, and probably hiding out for a few days to ensure no thoroughly awkward run-ins. But Ivan wants to go straight back for more. Even at his most selfish, Miles can recognize how rare and likely important this is for his cousin. It'll take Ivan a while to figure out himself, he supposes, but Miles already knows what it means. Elizabeth must be something special -- as if he had a doubt before now.

It's evening when he comes by, an hour or so after dinner. He's hoping she'll be around, because he'd rather catch her here than in his office or the library. Miles tugs at his uniform collar and knocks on the door, immediately shoving his hands in his trouser pockets to keep from fidgeting.

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Fortunately for Miles, Elizabeth is in. After receiving that strange address and going to that burnt-out warehouse, she's felt a little more inclined to spend time on the Moira. She's been taking the nightlife in small doses anyway, one night spent in with her reading wouldn't kill her.

She's just settling in with her book when he knocks. People coming to visit is new and different, but it's hardly inconvenient. Elizabeth smiles and gets up to get the door, wondering who had come to see her. When she sees who it is, her smile brightens-- it's been a while since she's seen him, she's missed him.

"Miles!" she opens the door wider. "What brings you to my side of the hallway?"

Well, she's certainly bounced back, it seems. That's a relief. He wishes Ivan'd told him earlier, that he could've checked in on her sooner, but there doesn't seem as much to be worried about as Miles had expected. He returns the smile with a grin of his own, eyes lighting up.

"Just saying hello. I wanted to check in, see how you've been doing. I'm not interrupting, am I?"

"No! No please, come in!" Elizabeth steps back to invite him inside, then hurries to the bed to fix it. There is, yes, the telltale detritus of one who spent a day sick and hung over-- glasses of water in various stages of being finished, a half-eaten package of plain crackers, a washcloth that must have been damp at one point... She tries to sweep it all away, but finally just ends up setting it on her desk.

"With all the activity, I wanted to spend a night in. Even better if the company can come to me!" she says with a laugh, kicking her shoes under the bed. "Sit, sit-- I can make us some tea if you like?"

Miles' gaze sweeps around the room, taking it in with a slightly knowing quirk to his mouth. Yes, he's spent many a morning at least that incapacitated, usually after a night of drinking with Ivan at one Imperial function or another. Don't worry, Elizabeth, you're not the only one.

Except Miles has never had a flashback and freaked out at Ivan in a case of mistaken identity -- which is sort of surprising, actually -- but that's half the reason he's here. He follows her in, letting the door close behind her, and leans against the wall while she hastily tidies up.

"I don't blame you for wanting a quiet evening," he says mildly, tilting his head at her. Her date with Ivan must have been excitement enough. "Tea would be lovely -- don't feel you have to clean on my account, though. I promise I'm not offended. You should see our cabin." He half-smirks. "For a soldier, Ivan's terrible at keeping tidy. The man doesn't even do hospital corners."

"Somehow, that doesn't surprise me," Elizabeth says with a little laugh. He says to stop cleaning, but Elizabeth would prefer Miles to see a more... together side of her? Or maybe she's embarrassed about her brush with five alcoholic drinks in under an hour.

"Being on this planet is tiring, isn't it?" She starts over to the little electric kettle and the many bags of tea that were left for her date aftermath. "Lessons, more lessons, dating, new things to see every night-- and then I was handed this scrap of paper by someone and I hiked all the way out to some silly burnt out warehouse. Probably a joke," she grouses, setting the kettle on its base, hunting for the switch and starting it.

Tiring indeed. This place is exhausting compared to Caducus Primary, and he'd died on that frigging planet. You'd think you couldn't get more exhausting than that. Miles wanders a little further into the cabin, decides it'd be improper to take a seat on a young lady's bed without invitation, and falls into a sort of parade rest out of habit, hands clasped behind his back.

"Yeah, I heard about your -- wait, what?" Miles blinks abruptly, then his brows draw down. He peers at Elizabeth with just a tinge of alarm. "What warehouse? Who gave it to you?"

"Someone in dark clothes, I didn't get a good look at them before they disappeared into the crowd. Here, I still have the flyer..."

Elizabeth goes to her desk and picks up the folded paper, unfolding it and handing it over to Miles. "I had one hell of a time figuring out where this place was-- but when I got there, there wasn't anything aside from a rotting building, some bloodstains, and this--"

She wakes up her MID and angles it so Miles can see. She swipes through some photos she took: the bloodstains on the floor, and the flag with the odd symbol.

"I expected something would happen to me there once I saw the blood, but no one else showed themselves. I walked around for almost half an hour-- nothing."

Miles looks at the photos on her MID, taking note of what she says and filing all that away, and then he pulls away from the wall to run a hand through his hair.

"Elizabeth," Miles says with a pained look on his face, "are you telling me that a mysterious, dark-clad stranger handed you a cryptic piece of paper with an unknown address, which turned out to be a derelict blood-spattered building, and you went alone? Did you even tell anyone?"

Elizabeth blinks owlishly at Miles for a moment, then contemplates the blanket on her bed.

"...I suppose that's something I can do now, isn't it?" Telling people where she's going, she means. Maybe even getting backup. Elizabeth offers him a wincing smile. "Force of habit?"

Miles stares at her for a moment, and then he suddenly falls back against the wall and bursts out laughing, covering his face with one hand. It's a minute before he recovers himself, trying to swallow the last few giggles down, though his shoulders are still shaking.

"No, sorry, I just -- " Miles snorts out another laugh, a wide grin stretched across his face. "It's just that I think I finally understand how my cousins must feel every time I run off to do what they insist is something stupid and probably fatal." He chuckles again, his laughter finally subsiding, but the grin remains. "It's a hard habit to break. But yes, please do tell someone, Elizabeth. Or you're likely to end up like me. Remember how peeved you were when I disappeared for three days without explanation?" His eyes twinkle in amusement.

Oh, he's laughing at her. This is a little humiliating, honestly, and she's not exactly sure why Miles is laughing about this. Elizabeth blushes and keeps on smiling, hoping the punchline is going to be explained to her soon.

It's a good punchline, and particularly ironic for Miles to be lecturing her about safety.

"I was not peeved, I was concerned!" she argues, though she's grinning too. "And our situations are completely different-- you try being omniscient for two years and then snapping right back to being worried someone's about to jump you."

There's also the fact that she was ready, willing, and able to break somebody's nose if she had to.

"You were a little peeved," Miles says, grinning, although his expression falters slightly and sobers with a nod of acknowledgment. "Fair point," he concedes, pulling away from the wall again, this time actually making his way over to Elizabeth, hands stuck in his trouser pockets. "Well, you've got people here. People who would prefer to know where to look if you go missing."

He flashes another grin at that, just to highlight the fond humor in it, but he tilts his head at her with another flicker of concern. "Aside from the obvious delight in basking in your general vicinity, I came by to check on you, see how you're doing. But you seem to be doing just fine, if you're getting up to potential mischief all on your own."

"That's fair..." Elizabeth folds her hands in front of her and smiles wistfully. It's a wonderful thing to have to inform people where she was-- in case she did get into something. She might not have to rely on nothing but her own wits and strength to get through things. "I promise, next time I'll tell you." And she means it. What reason would she have to doubt what Miles is telling her?

"Oh-- I'm guessing Ivan told you about how our date ended?" Elizabeth folds her arms and chuckles awkwardly. Ivan talked about her a lot to Miles, this doesn't seem odd to her, but she is rather embarrassed about it.

"Never thought my first date would end with my head in a trashcan, but the universe is full of surprises still."

"Well -- yes," Miles admits, mouth twisting wryly. "But I asked him. Not with the intent to pry, mind, it started out as a casual exchange, but then he mentioned that things went a little...awry, and I pressed him for details. I mean, I was worried, it wasn't just a play for gossip. It sounds like you had a...difficult evening. I just wanted to make sure you were doing alright. Head in a trash can isn't usually a sign of a good date, but it seems like you both made the best of it."

That's all completely true, Miles' concern for Elizabeth's well-being is one hundred percent genuine, and it comes from a place of friendship as well as romantic interest. But he's tamping the latter down the best he can. No good would come of it, especially now, and he's loath to complicate things for Ivan, much though watching his cousin squirm would yield much in the way of entertainment. But there are things Miles holds sacred, even if they're different from what Ivan does.

Miles hesitates a moment, rocking back onto his heels thoughtfully in front of Elizabeth before he speaks. "Does Ivan know?" He doesn't feel he needs to specify what he's talking about. He's kept Elizabeth's secrets this long, he'd never spill them to Ivan without express permission.

Elizabeth looks up from setting out mugs for tea, a little taken aback from the abrupt direction change in the conversation. Obviously he's asking for a reason, Miles wouldn't bring it up unless it was relevant. At least, Elizabeth believes Miles wouldn't bring up things that clearly cause her distress without a reason.

"No-- why should he?" Elizabeth tries to laugh. "It isn't as though he's serious about this, we're only doing things together. That doesn't require a whole... liturgy on quantum physics. I mean, be honest Miles, you know that if I tried to explain it, I wouldn't get much past 'holes between timelines' before he'd turn around and walk away with his fingers in his ears."

And it isn't so much that she couldn't stand to lose Ivan in particular-- she couldn't stand to feel like she terrifies people again. She waits for the water to boil with her back to Miles.

"It's not necessary. Once I get boring... There's just no need to stop him right now, is there?"

Miles holds up both hands in a disarming gesture. "I'm not challenging your decision, just asking -- you know, in the interest of staying on the same page. That choice is entirely yours, Elizabeth, I wouldn't dare to presume otherwise."

He means it, too. He doesn't think it suitable to contest her claim about how serious this thing Ivan is, one way or another, although he tilts his head at her curiously. "I wouldn't say that's an inaccurate assessment," he concedes with a slightly rueful smile. "Ever since we were kids, Ivan's developed an astonishing taste for burying his head in the sand. I've occasionally considered suggesting he move to Beta Colony someday, they've got plenty there. And the Orb of Unearthly Delights, come to think of it. But I don't think you give him quite enough credit." His smile turns crooked, that usual manic glimmer of humor flashing in his eyes. "He puts up with me, doesn't he?"

Miles watches her back for a moment, considering her discomfort. He hadn't really intended to take this conversation down an uncomfortable path, but then again, it was sort of inherent in his line of curiosity and the whole underlying purpose of the visit -- besides enjoying Elizabeth's lovely company, of course. He didn't come here to bring her down, though, and so he quickly strives to make up for it with one of his de facto tactics, circling around to her side to sweep her a deep, flourishing bow in true Vor style, if a bit exaggerated. "My dear Miss Dewitt," he says in a grave tone, though his eyes are twinkling, and he puts a hand over his heart, "you are far too exquisite a creature to ever bore a soul. Any man who thinks otherwise simply isn't fit to be graced with your affections."

"You're cousins though, Miles," Elizabeth points out-- in good humor, her tone doesn't suggest defensiveness or that she feels attacked. If anything, she's relieved she can finally tell someone what she's been thinking about just how long this thing with Ivan is going to last before something happens. Something seemed to always happen around the Moira. "He's told me you're practically brothers, and I honestly believe that. I'm... Well." She gives him a sad look. "He hasn't even scratched the surface with me. And I don't know that I want anyone to, not just him." She'd already warned Wanda to stay away, and Eggsy, poor Eggsy had too many questions about her rebounded back onto him. Miles and Clark... they're the only two.

That she remembers, at least.

The grandiose gesture is always effective on an old-fashioned sort like Elizabeth. She smiles and blushes at the compliments, thinking to herself that if it was possible to die from being offered too many compliments, she'd die at the hands of someone with a 'Vor' at the beginning of their last name. All three of them were just too good at it.

"I think, Lord Vorkosigan, you are laying it on a little thick. ...but there might be some truth to it." She leans down to put a kiss on his cheek.

Hm. It hadn't occurred to Miles that Ivan's unselfaware affections might not be so enthusiastically returned. He hardly blames her, though, knowing what he knows about her, how lonely and difficult her life has been. It's that sad note that always rings in his mind with Elizabeth, even when she's sweet and smiling and laughing.

"Well, no one's saying you have to scratch anyone's anything just now," Miles says reasonably. "But give it some time, Elizabeth. I mean -- no one can decide this for yourself but you, but...I don't think you've got as much to be afraid about as you think you do, when it comes to opening up to people around here, at least not when it comes to the weirdness factor." He shrugs. "I wouldn't dismiss it out of hand, is all."

Miles straightens up from the bow and he's about to laugh and respond with something along the lines of I know, that's why I did it when she kisses him. Well, kisses his cheek, but that's surely enough to stop him in his tracks, all the lordly theatrics draining out of him in an instant, and he flushes instantly before he can stop himself. She probably just means it as an innocent, playful gesture -- same with all the dancing, with everything -- and he should take it as such, he really should, but he can't help the kneejerk near-swoon that overcomes him before he catches himself with a nervous little laugh. "Ah -- quite." Very eloquent, Miles, very witty.

Elizabeth straightens up and grins at him-- apparently he liked that, and she's very happy he did. It was a sweet thing to say, and she appreciated it. Just saying as much wouldn't convey what it actually meant to her to hear someone tell her she's interesting enough without her ability to warrant company and affection. Despite knowing the most terrifying thing about her, he still comes to visit and cheers her up. That's a sure-fire way to earn her affection.

"I'll try not to dismiss it. I'll think about it. I know everyone is strange here in some way or another, but..." She pulls on her pinky idly. "Even if they didn't start trying to figure out how to restore my ability to see the doors, don't you think they'd look at me and wish I would just take them home?" She frowns, hesitant, at Miles. "Don't you ever wish I could just take you and Ivan and Greg home?"

"Not at your expense," Miles says instantly, now recovered from his momentary bout of embarrassment and that flutter of excitement. That peculiarly Miles intensity is back about him, in the way he looks at her with his slightly tilted head. The slight raise of his eyebrows is mild, his gaze fond, but quite serious. "Don't get me wrong, I want to go home. I miss Barrayar and -- well, I miss it all like hell. Of course I do -- we all do. But if it meant it'd ruin this brand new life you've started here, rob you of your chance to have one -- if it'd just take something away from you that you've spent your entire life wanting..." On impulse he reaches out to squeeze her hand, just to show her how sincere he is. "Then, no. I don't wish that at all."

"...but you could go home, Miles," Elizabeth insists. Clearly Miles didn't understand what she was saying. Clearly once she clarified, he would reconsider. "You'd never see me again, you wouldn't know if my life was what I wanted it to be or if I was miserable. You'd be far away..."

Elizabeth squeezes his hand back, the scenario playing out in her head all too easily and her heart breaking just from the thought of it. Used by a friend. It's a horrible thought, and even if it's not going to happen, she can't stop entertaining whether or not it's plausible.

"People... people take care of themselves, even if it means walking on someone else. It happens, it's a fact."

"I'd know," Miles says firmly, although his eyes are surprisingly gentle. He hasn't let go of her hand. "Even if I never saw you again, I'd know. I'd know I abused your friendship in the very way you fear the most. I'd know I took something important away from someone for whom I care very much. I could not abide by that -- in fact, I'd rather die. It would damage my honor beyond repair." His intent, serious face breaks with a small, crooked smile. "And I'm sure you've gathered by now that Barrayarans are very serious about their honor."

He'd given her his word as Vorkosigan, after all. There is nothing more serious to him than that.

For a long moment, Elizabeth doesn't know what to say. She knows she should have expected this from Miles, knows that he wouldn't do what so many before him had done, but it's a hard lesson for her to forget. People would use her. People would hurt her. People would be afraid of her. She had to stay out in front of it or Columbia would happen all over again.

But not with Miles. It wouldn't start with him. She believed that, she wanted to believe it.

Elizabeth puts Miles' hand in both of hers, biting at her lip fiercely to keep herself from crying. It's really not helping. No one has said, this bluntly, that they care about her and what she wants, and the further that sinks in the tighter her throat feels. She misses Booker, she misses feeling like someone knows everything and still cares.

"Miles--" She can't get a sentence out without her voice wavering.

Oh, god. He hadn't meant to make her cry. At least he knows it isn't because he's upset her -- well, not in the way he's most worried about, anyway -- Miles watches the expression on her face, his own breath stilling, his chest a little tight. It's damn near heartbreaking to see her buckle under the weight of such rare sympathy, heartbreaking because it shouldn't be rare. He glances down at the way her hands are clasped around his and wonders if she knows the significance of that gesture on Barrayar. She probably wouldn't have taken his hands if she did. She wouldn't ask something of that magnitude of him, just like he wouldn't her.

"Elizabeth," he says, hesitantly, but god, he hears her voice shake, and he moves to reach up to put an arm around her shoulders. What does one say in this situation? Sorry isn't really the right sentiment, because he's not. No, the hug is probably his best bet. "It's alright," he murmurs, soothingly, he hopes.

"I know," she nods and bends down further to help him reach, her arms going around his back. "I know it's alright. Everything is just... finally alright."

Well. More alright than in Columbia or Rapture. The Moira still had its host of problems, to be fair, but she had friends and a life. People who wanted to know where she was going before she ran off into a warehouse to wait for someone to jump her.

"Miles--" Elizabeth sniffs and wipes her eye as she straightens up. "I haven't found that movie yet, but I'm not doing anything tomorrow night. Do you want to have dinner with me?" she asks, trying to shake off the dour tone for something a little more cheerful. "I promise I won't pass out on you, I'll be very careful with what I drink."

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