thisavrou_log | september overflow log

Well ah... I think I got more paranoid than I used to be. I guess it is natural, knowing more about the universe. [But it's less paranoia that people will hurt them, and more paranoia that bad things will happen to them. And he already had a good amount of that before.]

[But he detours from the subject.]

Anyway, what was your friend like? You don't mention your friends from back home too much.

[ There's a pretty good reason why Snake doesn't mention them much, Niko. Part of it is that Snake doesn't have a lot of friends in general. The other part has to do with most of them having pretty unseemly ends.

Otacon's the exception. ]

There's nothing wrong with some healthy paranoia.

[ Snake hears a familiar bark coming from a distance down the shore. Jaegar's right where he left him, so that's a relief at least. He'd packed some food to bring back to the dog, picking out whatever proteins he could find from the mantis' fare. ]

He was one of the greatest soldiers I ever got to work with. We rank by code names in FOXHOUND, obviously, and he earned the name Fox. Which is the only ranking higher than Snake, and he's the only one who ever got it.

So that is what the "Snake" is about. I guess I get it now. [He'd been confused by the sheer number of Snakes. He might have been told once before, but not in any context where he registered it as a skill set.]

[Niko does note that "was". Knowing both their luck, maybe it's someone that isn't around anymore. They both come from those sorts of lifestyles.]

Sounds like a good guy. [And like Snake really looked up to him. Niko stoops and offers the dog his knuckles to sniff when they reach him.] What happened to him?

[ The legacy of Snake is one that's difficult to explain. It had also been inherited more than earned, not that he'd known that when he'd originally gotten the title. He remembers the sense of pride that had filled him that day, but it tastes stale in his mouth now. Either way, he nods.

Snake circles around behind Jaegar to untie him, and while the dog sniffs at Niko's hand for a few moments, then he practically tackles Snake in excitement. At least it does a little bit of work to take the edge off of where this conversation has gone. ]

I did. [ It's a blunt response, but Snake's not sure what else to say. He bends down to run both hands through Jaegar's coat, keeping his eyes on the dog as he talks. ] We ended up on opposite sides. Fox was between me and someone I had to stop. So we fought.

Why did he get between you? What would it have been worth to go against your friend?

[He can tell that Snake cares; especially if he named his dog after the man, he must still care about his lost friend deeply. It's harder for Niko to consider how that must feel; when his friend sold their unit out, all their other friends, he was never able to forgive Darko.]

[Everything that came before, the hollows of their friendship, felt like a lie. What makes this one special is actually a good question, especially since Snake strikes him as a man that does not like to be betrayed or turned on.]

[But then, as an afterthought, he adds-]

That dog's feet are big. Is going to be good size.

[ It would be nice to just talk some more about his husky and how he's going to end up big enough to bowl any of them over, but Snake isn't one to shy away from a subject once he's this far into it. It's not something he deserves to keep to himself, given how everything turned out.

So, once he's given Jaegar enough attention and offered him a piece of meat to gnaw on, Snake straightens again and turns back to Niko, his expression weary with the weight of his particular memory. ]

He was trying to protect Big Boss. [ Snake's father. ] It was my mission to stop him, but Fox was loyal to the end. It wasn't personal between us. [ It hadn't felt like a betrayal to Snake at the time, although maybe it should have. To this day, Snake doesn't hold any of that against Fox. Their friendship had still been real, regardless of who they held allegiance to. ]

He wouldn't back down, so I had no choice but to fight him.

[ Snake can't say whether it was "worth it" or not, but he tries not to think about it that way. It would take him down too many dark roads. ]

Yeah... Sounds like a tough situation. And from what I hear you say, Big Boss is a man who makes very bad decisions when it comes to his wars. [And not knowing where your loyalty should go, to a friend or an employer? Is a damnable issue. He feels bad for Snake, there.]

Sorry, man.

I wish we have not been placed in this sort of situation, but ah... Since it's a possibility, what would you do if you ever saw him alive again? 'Cause when those dead people turn up...

[ It's not like Snake can really say he understands the relationship between Gray Fox and Big Boss. He almost wonders if there had been a father-son element in there, if Frank had been the person that Big Boss wished to be his actual son.

Better not to think too hard on that kind of thing, though.

Snake snorts at Niko's observation. ] Yeah, that's an understatement. [ Big Boss had pretty much gone off the deep end by the time that Snake took a flamethrower to him.

As for that question, well, it's something Snake's thought about before. After a quiet pause that he spends drawing one of his boots through the sand, he shrugs one shoulder. ] It depends on what state he was in. After our fight, he was captured and experimented on. He wasn't... quite right when he came back. [ If Fox showed up in that state, it'd be hard to know how to deal with him. ]

[Snake's stories always get a little more interesting when the robots and the clones and the mad scientists come into the mix. No less tragic, but weird as hell.]

Would he be dangerous if he came back like that?

[He tries to ask that instead of the harder questions. Would the guy have even been okay without the experimentation? A friend you like kills a boss that you're loyal to? He wouldn't have come back the same, even if he'd been left well enough alone afterwards.]

[But even knowing this, he finds himself asking-]

What did they do to him?

[All of the answers that can come out of Snake's mouth promise to be terrible at this point.]

[ This isn't something that Snake's used to talking about. At this point he's gotten used to offhandedly mentioning that he killed his own father, but Frank is a sorer subject and he has to take a few seconds to get his emotions under control. He can still remember how he felt when he'd realized who that cyborg ninja really was... ]

I don't know all the details. Just that he wasn't always in control of his own mind. He'd lash out, have screaming fits, something about medicine.

[ Snake sighs heavily and leans back on his heels, rubbing at his eyes. When Jaegar recognizes that he's in distress, he pads forward and nudges his muzzle up against Snake's free hand. Snake idly pets him while focusing his attention on Niko. ]

Still, when he was lucid he tried to help me. There was still some of him in there. Maybe someone on the ship would be able to stabilize him, I don't know.

[ Just the idea of it is enough to make him feel sick. ]

[He's never seen Snake that bothered by anything, but realistically he knows they've never talked about his friends. And if was Niko, he'd sure as hell be bothered by someone doing this to one of his friends.]

Maybe. People here got way more advantages than either of us, though.

But I hope if you see him again it will be when he is in a state to talk normal.

[Niko reaches down to scritch Jaegar again.] Good dog. [Because he saw what he did there.]

[ Snake can't even say with confidence whether he'd like to see Frank again, if he were given the choice. On the one hand, it might be better for him to remain at peace, if such a thing even exists. On the other, he deserved a better end than what he got. And maybe they would be able to talk over everything that happened, and finally work together again.

Jaegar butts his head against Niko's hand, capturing Snake's attention and giving them something to talk about other than this depressing subject. ]

There's no telling with this place. We haven't had any new arrivals since the Ingress was shut down, and right now I'm not even sure if we'll be able to get back in the air.

[ With a sigh, Snake turns to look at the beached Moira. It's not like he'll be much help getting it running again. ]

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