thisavrou_log | I don't have a choice but I'd still choose you

Entry tags:

I don't have a choice but I'd still choose you

Who: Nathan Drake (

sketchycharacter) and Elena Fisher (

tearsinajar)
When: One fine evening on Vacation Planet
Where: A fancy establishment
What: Mr. and Mrs. Drake try to take the "strange" out of "estrangement" by having a first date ~~2.0~~ 3.0
Warnings: Hideous romantic grossness. Bring a toothbrush. Also references to married adult activities and maybe some angst.

[It's been a long, long time since Nate's gone on a first date, and he doesn't remember the experience of preparing for it making him so nervous. Granted, he hasn't gone on a lot of first dates that actually mattered, but still—he's a grown adult, not a clueless teenager, and he shouldn't have sweaty palms, jitters or the need to check his suit for stray lint every few minutes. But check, check and check, he's got every one of them.

It doesn't actually help that he's married to the woman he's taking out on this particular first date. Considering the circumstances of what led to it being a first date and how much he has to lose if this goes badly, it actually makes things worse. And it's not like he can look back to their original first date, which was running around on cursed zombie island or marathon sex in a Panamanian hotel, depending which one he decides to count, for inspiration. The first option would be very hard to replicate and the second wouldn't do much to fix their problems.

So all right, he's doing this without a net. What else is new? At least the unlimited credits allowed him to buy a (pretty sharp, if he says so himself) new suit so he doesn't look like a complete schmuck unworthy of the gorgeous woman he's taking out, even if he is. Nate checks his watch, takes one last look at himself and heads over to Elena's room. It's time.

At least next door isn't very far to walk. He steadies himself and raps on the door.]

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[ She'd debated long and hard on whether her choice of dress was appropriate for a "first date". It was a dark navy blue in color, form fitting, dipping low in the front and even lower down the back. Gold and diamonds hang along the curve of her spine, a single chain looped down under the base of her throat. Elena can't recount the last time she's dressed up this nice; it takes effort each time she passes the mirror to not change into something less dressier. She feels like it's too much, that he's going to take her down to the beach for some boardwalk food and games, nothing too serious.

God, she's overdressed. She's so overdressed. And there's no one in the room she shares with three others to give their opinion, which would've helped immensely right about now.

Many scenarios run through her mind of how the skirt might be too long and one of them would trip, or that she'd ruin it by stepping on it with her heels, tear the fabric. She paces, she wrings her hands, she even tells herself out loud that she's being stupid and needs to get over herself; this is going to be a good night, one that's been long overdue between them.

Jesus, the butterflies in her stomach are making her feel panicky, hands unsteady that she has to shake them out and make fists, rinse and repeat.

Deep breaths, deep breaths.

Tonight's going to be a good night, a fun night. It'll be awkward, most likely, with how she knows the both of them will need a bit to find their footing, initially, but it'll be full of humor, light banter, maybe some romance— Elena reminds herself that she's known Nate for years, years, and in some of those years they've been— are— married. All of that should come easily. Like they've haven't been apart for a year or so, like their marriage isn't strained.

Sitting on the very edge of the chair she's asking herself: what is romance, how does one do it?

What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me no more—

Elena jumps at the knock, heart lodged in her throat. She stares at the metal door that separates herself from him, knows who's out there waiting, a fearful look on her face. How pathetic is that— Elena Fisher, all nerves and worries over a first date with her husband whom she hasn't had any contact with for roughly a year, a reporter from Florida making a name for herself by entering dangerous war-torn countries and getting right into the front lines of war all for the sake of a story.

Her knees feel weak as she rises and crosses her quarters, her arms feel heavy. She hesitates for all but a second as she takes a deep breath, passes a quick hand over the blonde hair hanging down and loose over her left shoulder, and hits the unlock key to let the door slide open—

He's in a suit. A suit.

If Elena thought her knees were jelly on the walk to the door, it's a wonder she's still standing now as she stares at him. She almost forgot how well he cleaned up in a suit, eyes taking in every bit from how the jacket sits on his broad shoulders to the cuffs to the belt at his hips. She can't seem to find her voice and feels absolutely ridiculous for how bashful she's being, face warming at how she's suddenly a teenager going to prom and everything about this moment is like the first time.

But isn't that the point? ]

...hi.

[Nate's more than a little dumbstruck when Elena answers the door, and he's certain it must show on his face. He's seen her dressed up to the nines before, of course, at important work functions to which he'd accompanied her and their own wedding and the occasional fancy date night, but it's been a long time and his memories are nothing compared to the real thing.

The dress is gorgeous and fits her amazingly—the word slinky comes to mind—and it's surprising but really appealing to see her down instead of swept up and out of her face, a functional choice. He's really glad that he put in the time to buy a suit and have it tailored to fit him, boring as that had been.]

Hi.

[He transitions from a probably somewhat stunned expression to a nervous smile as he steps inside, reaching for her hands. He hasn't known if this was the right step to take to get them back on track, hasn't been sure if sitting down and pushing through some painful conversations until everything is on the table wouldn't be the longer-lasting fix, but now he's really glad they're doing this.]

Wow. You look great.

[It's almost the exact same thing he said on the air strip in Yemen, but there's a world of difference in his tone. This isn't said as some perfunctory (though true) greeting meant to make things seem normal, establish the fact that he's not bowled over by seeing her again.

He's totally bowled over this time, and glad for it. Glad it shows, because if the last memory she has of him before space is Nate acting like a jackass who cares more about his treasure hunt and his family legacy than about her, then he has to try his hardest to show her that that isn't true now and wasn't true then.

He loves her more than anything, anybody. He wants to make this work.]

[ Her hands are still a little shaky, even as his close around them. Instinctively she grasps his hands tightly, a laugh pushed out like a breathless exhale, that bit of warmth in her cheeks beginning to show in a rosy flush. Elena hates that she's blushing and she hates it even more that he can see it. She's always so confident and sure of herself and with tonight, he's knocked her completely off her pedestal. Knocked down one of the walls she'd built, pulled her out of her comfort zone because she'd spent all that time living without needing him, without needing anyone.

By the reaction on his face when she'd greeted him, this dress was a very good choice. And when he compliments her, she doesn't think of Yemen, of when he'd stepped off the plane or the tone of voice he'd used then. Instead, this time, his compliment reassures her of her decision and sets the thousands of tiny butterflies in her lower belly to flutter anew. ]

I feel like... God, I feel so nervous. I didn't think that was possible. [ A hand releases his to press to her stomach. No, she's not going to be sick, she's just living in the moment. With him. This is something special, there's meaning behind it because he's making a clear effort and it's...him. He still has that effect on her after the time apart. ] There's this crazy fluttering right here, which is funny because we're married and this isn't our first time going out and— and I'm rambling. See, nervous.

You look— you look great yourself by the way.

[ Elena snaps her mouth shut before she says anything else, lips pursed as she blows out a breath to calm herself. ]

You know what, I...I should probably change. It's too much.

[The babbling is unusual for her. Even if she doesn't always feel completely confident in herself, she's almost always able to carry off a steady air of self-possession. Nate's always figured it came from spending so much time on camera—gotta put on the right face for the audience. The fact that she's so nervous now, and admitting to it, is both surprising and adorable.

And it makes him feel better. They should have never gotten to the point of being anything less than comfortable and secure in each other's presence, but that ship has sailed and he's just glad to know he's not the only one feeling anxious.]

Oh, no. No way. [He squeezes her hands, ready to pull her back to him if he needs to.] You're gorgeous and that dress is perfect for where we're going.

[This is when he would kiss her if things were normal. If they were just a happily married couple going out for date night.]

I feel...the same way. [If she can admit to the nervousness, so can he.] But it'll be fun. C'mon.

[ She'd begun to move away but his hands kept her right where she needed to be. He admits to his nerves and she relaxes, relieved and even happy that she's not alone. Again a laugh enters the air of the otherwise quiet room, more of the uneasiness she'd had releasing with it. ]

Okay. But I want to grab something. And I need my clutch.

[ Elena gives his hands a squeeze; she'll come right back, and she won't be changing. Turning puts her back to him, giving him a view of how far the slinky black piece drops to her lower back, the diamonds and gold chain winking with her movements— more like with her gliding away.

Clutch in one hand, her camera's held in the other, lens cap popped off as she returns as promised.

She just wants one picture, or maybe two. A serious, smiling one and a silly one. Something to remember tonight by, other than what he's got planned for the evening. Something she can look back on tomorrow to remind her that they'd had a great night out, that they were still them and what they'd had together in the earlier days of their marriage— happier days— wasn't entirely lost. ]

[Nate gives her an appreciative look as she glides away, really enjoying the jewelry and what the dress reveals and really, everything. It's all a distraction from the question of what she's getting but when she turns around with her camera in hand, he's not at all surprised.

They both document things (the present, the past) in their own ways; him with his drawings and her with her camera, be it still or video. Her method isn't the one he'd choose and vice versa, but he's always liked that they have that in common, especially now, since this isn't a moment for drawing.

He knows his place. Nate slips an arm around her waist and leans in close so she can get a good shot of them together. The smile was already in place.]

Want me to say 'cheese'?

[ He knows her so well, not even questioning her when she'd turned back to him with the device in hand. This is what they do, what they share, and Elena loves that part about them (among other things). If he asked her to stand still for a quick sketch, she would, no questions asked. She might tease him a bit but she's seen how he sketches— he's fast, and his memory is amazing, very photographic.

Camera timer in place, lifted up and angled for the shot, she smiles alongside him. ]

Whatever you want.

[ The rough skin of his jaw teases her cheek; he smells good, feels warm at her side. It reminds her of the times they'd go out together on either dates or to news galas where she needed to mingle and connect with contacts for her boss.

She leans into him. ]

Three, two...one...

[Click. No flash, easy peasy. ]

[A simple click captures what he hopes they'll remember as the start of something good, the next phase in their lives. A first date that might feel strange at times because it has so much riding on it but that leads to more like it, where the only purpose of the night out is to be happy together.

He's happy now. The smile he gives the camera isn't faked or forced. Nate hopes that when he looks at it, he sees only the glow that being near her brings him, and not the face of a man who has a lot to make up for.

It's tempting to turn his face and sneak a kiss, but he settles for tightening his arm around her waist. As she said, that'll be an incentive.]

That's definitely going to be a keeper. You should give me a copy.

[It would be a keeper even if they were both cross-eyed and making stupid faces. But this one is definitely refrigerator magnet-worthy. If only he had a refrigerator.]

We're not done. There's one more.

[ Her smile had been beaming as they stood side by side. There was nothing fake about hers, just a simple relaxed happiness that she felt as they were together right now. Her nerves from earlier had lessened, not a single one showing in the photograph, her camera game face on.

Elena sets up the timer once again and holds the camera out. ]

Get ready.

[ This is where she turns her face to his, tilted up to make up for the height difference as her pursed lips press a kiss to his cheek. Right in time for the click.

She'd read his mind. ]

[It's going to be a great picture, because the click of the shutter happens exactly when his eyebrows are shooting up and his expression has shifted into clear but pleased surprise. This one is definitely going to be the keeper.]

Okay, that's going to be the better one.

[He's laughing as he turns to pull her into his arms, gazing at her with adoration. In this moment, it's so easy to believe that getting their marriage back to how it was in its best days won't take so long, because what work is there to do? They love each other, that's so clear, and they're happy now. It should be simple.

It won't be, of course. But it's nice to let himself believe.]

You ready to go, ah, downstairs?

[If they don't, he's going to be real tempted to start kissing her and not go anywhere, and that's not in the cards for tonight.]

I'm sure they're both good.

[ Camera off, she's smiling still as he pulls her in, unable to not laugh along with him, his happiness contagious. The hand holding the clutch drapes up over his shoulder. For a moment, just a moment, Elena forgets about everything that's happened as she looks up at him. All of the heartache and his wrongdoings, the gap they'd had to deal with in missing each other.

It's too bad her hands are full or else she'd stroke his jaw, instead basking in his close company and warmth. His love. ]

Ready whenever you are.

[ Heels or no heels, she still has to lean up. If kissing isn't in the cards for tonight then maybe leaning her head up so his lips can brush her brow will work better. ]

[It's more than a brush, it's a full-on nuzzle. Nate's feeling disgustingly sweet and not even a little embarrassed. There's more to this date night than cuddling in her room, though, so he slips out of her arms and takes her hand.]

C'mon, let's go then.

[If he doesn't think about it too hard, it's easy to pretend they're on a very high floor of a very unusual hotel, and the trip planetside is just a weird elevator ride. That impression is only helped by the beautiful scenery of BF3, which was probably designed to put people in the mood the spend. That's not in the cards tonight, though, not exactly.

Nate guides her to the fanciest restaurant on a block of fancy restaurants, and as they draw nearer, it becomes clear that neither of them are in the least overdressed. This place has a code, and normally Nate would never pass it.]

This restaurant is pretty in-demand, but it turns out they'll make room for a reservation when unlimited credits are on the table.

[ There's always that sinking sensation in both her chest and stomach whenever they transition from one level of gravity to the next. Elena pretends it's nothing, acts like nothing's wrong; she's too happy to let any little aches take her away from that happiness. Her marriage is on its way to being whole again, she's got her husband back at her side. God, this is too good to be true.

Everything is nearly perfect, even with the small kinks they need to work out.

Upon reaching this restaurant he's picked out, the walk there itself was just as lovely, and Elena spends every moment taking it in, her arm never leaving its place looped with his. She couldn't ever imagine a first date being as fancy as this, never with him— he really is trying. ]

You...really went all out on this...

[ Everyone is dressed up to the nines, that she can see from the outside; women at the front entrance waiting to be seated are wearing gowns and sparkling jewelry, while the men wear suits that would've cost both arms and a leg. Elena is caught staring, like they've just stumbled upon a priceless artifact or temple among the sandy beaches. This place reminds her of all the times they would attend dinners that served as mingles and greets to gathering new contacts for her employer. Those evening dates were mostly cocktail dresses. This place is much much more than that. ]

My God— could you imagine Sully getting his hands on a card? We probably wouldn't see or hear from him for a solid week.

[Part of him wants to point out that he didn't really do all that much. He bought a suit and bribed his way into prime reservations, two things that didn't take all that much work. But most of him is way too pleased with her reaction. Nate can't fix everything by taking her on fancy dates, but if he can use them to express how hard he intends to try and mend their relationship, then dammit, he will.]

Or two. Or maybe a month. [He laughs out loud at the very idea.] Or maybe we'd just leave him behind on this planet. As long as the credits kept flowing, I don't think he'd mind.

[The maître d' is all welcoming smiles and quick to provide an immediate escort to their table, which happens to be in a prime location. They're right next to a large window with a beautiful view of the collective, and not far away is a dance floor alongside which a quartet is playing (only two of whom appear to be human.) There'll be time for that later, though.]

I hope you're hungry, because I hear this place is has really good food.

I hope it does, because nothing beats this view.

[ Aliens or not, Elena's seated and she's got her attention fixed out the window, gaze moving from what's around and then up to the sky where the stars are out, the night sky clear as ever. It's perfect, all she could ever ask for— so far— in a first date. ]

How did you come across this place?

[ Looking across to him again, her attention pulled away from the sights beyond the glass, now she can admire the interior. The fashion of everyone enjoying themselves, the music. His way of romantic, where had he picked this up from? Someone had to have suggested the location. It seems odd that they'd spent so much time going to gala dinners together back in the day and dressing up that a date as extravagant as this was nothing out of the ordinary.

No, tonight was special. Tonight was a night she would remember and one he would make sure she remembered. ]

Nothing at all.

[He's looking at her, not out the window or at the dance floor. But he means it all the same. He's exceedingly pleased by her reaction, though. It might be hard to go wrong with a place as typically romantic as this, but it doesn't have to be original, it just has to make her happy.]

I asked around, did my research. I'm pretty good at that, you know.

[In some ways this is similar to her news galas, but even aside from the lack of schmoozing, it's out of the ordinary in the way he wants to be here, wants to make it a great night for them that gives her a reason to go on a second date. He's in this 100%, and he never wants to give her a reason to doubt him again.

He reaches across the table to table to take her hand, left in left, their rings close together.]

I know you are...

[ Her answer is soft, affectionate. There would be a hint of sadness but now isn't the time for it, and there's little room to accommodate the emotion when she catches the way he's watching her. Elena smiles across at him; if she could reach across and stroke his jaw, now would be the perfect moment for it. But her attention is drawn down when his hand wraps around hers, her fingers brushing the metal band around his one.

This isn't the first time she's seen him wearing it— it had been on his finger the day he had come by to sit with her before they'd gone off together for food. It looks good, and Elena's happy that he's got it on, that they're able to replace his lost one. ]

I'm glad it fits.

[ Both hands take his one, thumbs rolling the band around his finger. For some silly reason, she'd felt like he wouldn't have accepted it. That he would've rejected it. Which, again, is nothing more than a silly thought. ]

[He smiles as he watches her play with it, enjoying the feeling, enjoying the meaning of it. His finger had been bare for too long and even though he'd still rather have the ring she slid on his finger during their wedding, this is definitely the next best thing.]

Me too.

[He caresses the skin of one hand with his thumb, a tiny gesture.]

I like it. For all the stuff we can buy here, this is my favorite.

[She could have sent him a plastic Ring Pop with the candy part sucked off and it would have been great, as long as it was from her.]

Mm? Not even the journals? The pencils and the kit?

[ Her fingers continue to roll the band around, so content that they're having this little moment together. That the rough callus of his thumb feels just as she remembers it feeling whenever he'd run his hands over her. ]

Does this mean I'll find that one-year anniversary ring you still owe me in my mailbox one of these days?

[ Elena doesn't expect anything, truthfully. She's just teasing. Sometime after the one year mark was almost around the time everything had begun to go downhill in their marriage. ]

This is one of a kind.

[Sort of. Undoubtedly there were similar rings available for purchase. But the art supplies, while lovely, are exactly what they seem to be. The replacement wedding ring means something.]

Maybe. You've been patient enough for it.

[There's a faint note of sadness in his voice, but it can't take over. Not when she's here and so beautiful and they're both trying again, putting their hearts on the line. They will make this work. He has to believe that.]

A ring every year if you want, until we're old and gray. Because I plan on spending the rest of my life making things up to you.

[He lifts her left hand and leans forward so he can kiss the back of it.]

I'm just teasing, Nate...

[ Of course she hadn't expected him to go along with it. ]

What am I going to do with one hundred rings? [ Her words and smile are affectionate. Okay, so her heart melts a little when he kisses her hand. Just a little! If they weren't out in public, Elena would be leaning across the table and kissing him. ] And yes, a hundred rings. You said yourself— gray and old.

How about we just go with the one-year anniversary ring and then somewhere down the road, when we get there— [ If they get there. ] —another ring at five years or ten years.

[He knows she's just teasing. He'd still do it. A hundred rings? Done. He'll even do it the legit way and buy them instead of stealing them if she wants, though that's way less fun.]

I can do a ring every five years, sure. But really, one hundred isn't too many. There are plenty of things you could do with them. Wear one on each finger. Use them in arts and crafts.

[He sets her hand down again but keeps holding it across the table.]

Pass them out to the grandkids.

[ Her hand curls tighter around his on reflex at hearing the term 'grandkids'. They've never seriously discussed children. They've only ever joked about it, shared a secret little smile whenever it comes up. ]

I...really don't think we'll have that many. Don't count your chickens before they've hatched, and they haven't yet. Literally.

[ As nice as it is to think about these things, they first need to work on themselves and make sure that the foundation they have is solid, unbreakable, before they go and bring a kid or two into their little messed up world. ]

I didn't say we would. You can give them more than one ring each, you know.

[But he's smiling almost in acknowledgment of what she's thinking. Not because he can read her mind but because he's thinking the same thing, or has.

Nate's not going to pretend the idea of fatherhood doesn't terrify him. But deep down in his core, he wants kids, and he wants them with Elena. One day. Because when they have children, he's going to make sure he does it right.]

But chicken sounds good. I wonder if they have space chicken on the menu.

[It's an out, a way of easing back into the date and out of too-serious-for-tonight topics. Also, he really is hungry.]

Space chicken could be a thing. Or maybe they have— [ Elena drops her voice as she leans forward, a cautious look moving over the room. ] —alien chicken something.

[ The burgers and fries they'd indulged in on the boardwalk a few times already had tasted the same as the kind they had on Earth, nothing different, just as juicy and just as crispy. ]

—ooohhhh, a wrap section. I didn't think a place this fancy served wraps.

[ A dead serious look fixes on him from her end of the table. ]

I was expecting alien caviar. Tiny little alien baby fetuses so tiny the human eye can't see.

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