Someone's gonna get hurt

[squadgoals]

Who: Commander Shepard (squadgoals) & Nihlus Kryik (beautifulspaceraptor)
When: Post-Thane chat
Where: Mero Deck #013
What: Shep found out about the Clone stuff. Shep also found out that Nihlus already knew. Now it's time to find out why she didn't find it out from him.
Warnings: Swearing, probably. Maybe violence.


[She'd intended to send a message, first. "Nihlus, we need to talk", or "Nihlus, can you meet me in observation?", something like that. But instead, she'd stayed in her room, feeding her fish, folding up some loose laundry, until she knew he'd be in his room, alone.

It was only a few doors down, but the walk seemed longer, stretched by her own tense air. Keeping her steps purposefully light, she stops in front of Mero #013, and tries to look at the big picture. His motives are understandable. Hell, so were the clone's. She's just here to talk. Two adults, having a conversation about...

Well. Lies.

It was hard to unfocus from that one. Without giving herself further time to reflect, she raps on the door instead of ringing the bell, three business-like knocks. There's a pause before she announces to the door:]

Nihlus? It's Shepard. You around?

Comments

[squadgoals]

[This time, she looks up, giving him a long, hard, searching look.

The first time, his refusal didn't make sense. Had she misspoken? Misstated her intent? The second...

His voice is as far away as if they were talking to each other in different rooms — and he certainly wasn't talking to her.

The anger is at full swing, now, searing her nerves with an itchy feeling to move, run, attack, and it's all she can do to tamp down on it, and ask, voice low and quiet:]

Why are you protecting her?

[beautifulspaceraptor]

[ Dammit. Dammit. ]

We've both seen the results of the call-out posts on the Network. Reckless dissemination of information that's endangered a lot of crew members. Most of the resulting conflicts are still unresolved.

[ Not untrue. Not the primary reason he's protecting her, but not untrue.

Folding his arms, Nihlus resists the nervous urge to dig his claws into the scales under them. He's not going to let himself falter now. ]

I wanted to avoid anymore similar incidences. You have a lot of personal stake in this and I didn't believe it wise to tell you. It'd have been safer for the clone to choose to reveal herself on her own terms: she has some stake in keeping the peace until then.

[squadgoals]

[As he speaks, she never breaks eye line, letting his words fall one after another into a soundless void, spelling out their meaning. There's a long period of silence before she finally speaks, standing as she does.]

So that's how it is, huh? [Her voice is still low, almost hissed, through gritted teeth, shaking with a rumble of anger like a fast-approaching thunderstorm.]

You don't trust me. Everything, everything you know about me, who I am, what I've worked for--[She sweeps her hand through the air, a fast cut to emphasize her point.]--and you don't trust me enough to sit down and have a god-damned adult conversation with me?

[Her voice rises in volume as she speaks, the storm in full force.] I reached out to her, Nihlus! And you're here to police me, in case I, what, give her three chances?!

[beautifulspaceraptor]

This isn't about you.

[ There is nothing in his soft tones, nothing in his expression, nothing beyond a careful cold blankness, utterly calm despite her anger. ]

This is about the clone and keeping her and the rest of this ship as safe as it can be. Nothing more, nothing less. You yourself might not do anything brash but information travels fast on starships.

[ And he doesn't trust her there. She worked well in teams and she had a lot of teammates he knows she'd trust enough to tell this to- and they're all walking security holes. How long would the clone have been kept a secret if she'd found out earlier? ]

I'm not here to police anything, Shepard. You came here yourself. This is my answer.

[squadgoals]

Like hell it's not!

[She paces as he speaks, like a caged animal, waiting for an opening, eyes flashing with danger at his words. Forget adult conversations — he'd long-since decided how all of them would live this one out.

Wasn't about her? It was primarily about her — about her life, history, and, oh yes, she could read between the lines on the keeping of them, too. Not policing? Rich, coming hot on the heels of "You'd tell all your friends"!

She stops pacing suddenly, dead in front of the Turian, toe to toe. What she lacks in height is made up in presence, and riding a controlled froth of anger, she's got it in spades. Her initial outburst is gone, voice dropped again, words slow, not bothering to hide the cyclone of betrayal, fury, hurt.]

Loud and clear.

[For a very real second, it looks as if she's going to hit him — but at the last second, she turns on her heels, making for the door. She slams the 'open' button, feeling the mechanism crunch under her fist, and storms out when it zips aside.

Entrance made eternally ajar, her footfall is audible as it recedes down the hall, disappearing into her own room with a muted snap.]

[beautifulspaceraptor]

[ There's a temptation to go and force the door on its track, slam it shut, but Nihlus refuses to give into it. He doesn't move for a long while, just listening to the sound of his own breathing in the dark.

Was it worth it? a part of him jeers from the shadows. He shoves it into a cramped little box and stows it away with the other selfish little thoughts.

This wasn't about him either.

It wasn't about anything at all. ]