( OPEN ) what you don't know won't hurt you

[whatdidisay]

Who: Ivan Vorpatril & VARIOUS (including YOU)
When: the month of march (and stuff backdated into feb.)
Where: all around the ship
What: catch all log post and OPEN LOG
Warnings: none!


I. BAR

If his cousin is bartending, and even when he’s not, Ivan can be found at the bar most evenings. Some days just for a quick drink in passing, other nights he’s there until late in various states of inebriation, never crossing the lie into intolerably so. Affable and open, it’s no hardship to start a conversation with him; get near him and he might just start up one himself.

II. ON THE JOB

Ivan’s job is the least demanding on the entire ship, and he likes it like that. There’s days he fills with playing the non-terrifying games on his MID, at least between running around and making sure Navigation and Communications aren’t at odds with each other. Which they don’t ever seem to be, which makes his job that much easier.

Most days he can be found at his desk, slowly working on whatever demands have been made of him to stretch out his workday. The mealtimes that he doesn’t run off to the mess hall for, he takes in Navigation — munching on whatever food they managed to cough up while watching the stars pass them. Either way, it’s quite easy to pull his attention from his job should someone require it.

(( if you want something more specific, please feel free to PM me or PP @ robutts ))

Comments

[whatdidisay]

"Means 'cat'." He's very good at this naming thing, can you tell? "General Count for the other one was inspired, although Miles probably still has fits about it."

That isn't his fault. It's Miles', for accusing the cat of trying to suffocate him. Ivan had decided that the cat should have been named after the first person who tried that on his cousin; he's sure his great uncle wasn't the last who tried, all things considered. Miles just has that way about him.

Ivan's been drinking with Clark before. Sure, Ivan was drunk as hell then, trying to numb what he thought was the absolute end of an annoying relative's life but-- he distinctly remembers Clark drinking out of the bottle and not... whatever this is. Ivan's eyes narrow slightly as he watches, but then he takes pity on the other man. "Don't worry, the effect's still the same."

[smoothaf]

Cat. Really? So he can add unimaginative along with a total pushover to his assessment of Ivan.

"Not all of us drink to get drunk."

Napoleon can see when Ivan notices the differences in their behaviour, but he also notices when he ignores it for now. It's a perfectly normal response and yet he still finds himself disappointed in Illya's doppelganger.

"This isn't the worst, but it could be better."

[whatdidisay]

One of them was made for being a spy, Napoleon. Ivan isn't it. At least not yet.

He snorts at that remark, lifting his own glass to the other man in a sort of ironic salute. "As a Vor," he says, picking his words with a casual sort of practiced ease, "I must protest -- there's no other reason for drinking." It's traditional, odd-Clark. Very, very traditional.

The remark only gets a small roll of his eyes, and he gestures with an arm towards the bar. "Feel free to find something better."

[smoothaf]

"You would say that." From disappointment to stereotypical.

But Napoleon does slide over the bar to more carefully peruse the selection available. Gaby may not have appreciated his culinary talents, but he'll put them to work here to find out what he can mix to produce something acceptable. Bottles are opened and sniffed and anything rejected is carefully returned, but he does tip a whole bottle out on one occasion.

He whittles down the list to a couple of bottles and then starts digging around for a lemon replacement.

"Your people might make do, but that's no reason why you should do the same."

He even reaches over to drag Ivan's glass towards him while he's still searching.

[whatdidisay]

As if Ivan's going to kick up a fuss about being served a drink. "Go ahead," he says, with a wave and leaning back from the bar. Someone's going to have to come up with some sort of explanation for the dumped drink, but other than that? Ivan's fine with letting this weird Clark have the run of it.

He's doing a better job than Miles would have, that's for sure.

disclaimer: i know nothing of alcohol

[smoothaf]

It's nice of Ivan to give him permission, but he wasn't going to take no for an answer anyway.

Once he's whittled down the selection some and retrieved everything else he needs, Ivan's half empty glass is emptied out and given a quick rinse and wipe down. Napoleon's not going to let whatever garbage he was previously drinking contaminate his creation.

He's going to try and recreate a scotch cocktail. Plain scotch is going to be difficult, but if he mixes it up it might be easier to get away with. Plus he feels less bad mixing anything into it when it's not the real deal. Napoleon doesn't make it in a jug first to divide up, but instead pours equal amounts in both glasses as he goes along. When finished he pushes Ivan's glass towards him and picks up the other. The taste might be a mystery, but at least it smells right.

"Do you think it'll be any good?"

like i do, but that's ok we can muddle through this.

[whatdidisay]

Ivan takes a small sniff, and the nod he gives Odd-Clark is one of acceptance. It smells halfway decent, if overpoweringly alcoholic. Which is never a bad thing in Ivan's opinion. "Well there's only one way to find out, isn't there?"

Which means he throws it back, and then coughs and splutters for a moment. Whatever it was, he didn't think it would taste that strong, or remind him so much of maple mead. At least, Ivan thinks, this seems drinkable when you're not doing what he just did.

"Could use a slower appreciation--" he gives Odd-Clark with an empty smile, once he's recovered.

as long as no one else sees this....

[smoothaf]

Thanks for being his guinea pig. Now Napoleon gets to maintain his unflappable manner because he knows better than to throw it back in one shot.

"That's usually the point." He smirks and raises his own glass in a mock toast before taking a much more reasonable mouthful.

For a first attempt it turned out fairly well. However if this wasn't going to be his only attempt, he'd need to fine tune it before offering it to others. Or he might do that anyway for his own satisfaction. For some reason Napoleon has a lot of time on his hands now that he isn't running various missions for the CIA.

"Although I have to ask-- are you're losing your touch if you can't handle this?"

your secret is safe with me and the rest of the internet

[whatdidisay]

Did you really imply that he can't hold his alcohol, Napoleon? Ivan looks vaguely offended at the thought. "Good God, no. It just reminds me of maple mead, which is the worst abomination that ever came from the Vorkosigan District."

Which produced the General Count Vorkosigan, so. Ivan swirls his glass around, looking contemplative for a moment. "You thinking about picking up drink mixing as a job, then?"

i like to assume people don't read my threads okay

[smoothaf]

Ah, there we go. Now it's going to be unavoidable.

"Do you think I should hang up my communications post to serve this 'abomination'?"

Napoleon's equally offended by his remark although he doesn't let it show. This might have been his first try, but it wasn't that bad.

well i linked this for ac so you're out of luck there my friend

[whatdidisay]

Communications? That's not Clark's job at all. Ivan frowns, brow creasing. He'll come back to that in a second. "Maybe once you've worked out all the kinks. The job could use a better bartender than my cousin." Sorry he's not particular sorry, Miles.

Taking another skip, Ivan's frowns deepens. Looking from his drink to Napoleon back to his drink, he mulls the evidence over. He is too tipsy for this, he decides, and then when he next looks up, stares at him with a look that might have been intense if Ivan had practice at it. "Are you a clone?"

This is the wrong person to ask this of, although Ivan doesn't know that.

well i didn't because i couldn't be bothered checking for bonus ac!!

[smoothaf]

Napoleon watches the wheels turn in Ivan's mind with an amused smile. He's nowhere near inebriated so he can enjoy this to the fullest.

He raises one eyebrow. "Clone?"

For someone from Napoleon's time the first thing that would have come to mind is twin. To him this is an odd first question to ask.

"I'm older so no." He's from the 60's so he has to be the original if cloning was involved. Napoleon's mostly sure that isn't it anyway.

how u gonna climb the ranks now???

[whatdidisay]

"Miles is older than his clone," Ivan points out, and then realizes that it doesn't support his argument in the slightest and waves it off. "Tells everyone they're twin brothers six years removed." Mark, and Ivan dislikes thinking the name as much as he dislikes the idea of a new, additional cousin. One Miles is bad enough, another one who's got an itchy trigger finger is even worse.

Ivan frowns further staring at Napoleon harder. "Don't think you're his twin." Mostly because this man does not seem capable of punching holes in metal and flying, but you know what? He's seen weirder. "Are you?"

ONE RANK AT A TIME or top level for easy tracking

[smoothaf]

At Ivan's staring, Napoleon stares right back at him with a practised guileless expression.

"We could be twin brothers fifty years removed by your standards then."

He doesn't know about the punching holes and flying just yet. As far as he knows, they're just two normal guys who look eerily identical.

THAT'S FAIR I GUESS

[whatdidisay]

Oh, Ivan knows that sort of expression. He wears one a good chunk of the time.

"Are you?"

You know, he's just curious. Someone has already mentioned alternate universe and timelines on the network, but Ivan hadn't paid attention to it.

[smoothaf]

Napoleon on the other hand heard it, but didn't really understand it. He had enough difficulty wrapping his head around being in space and timelines not matching up let alone adding alternate universes to the mix.

"Can I say yes?"

He's already like the wayward brother who leaves a mess everywhere for Clark to clean up.

[whatdidisay]

"If you want me to not believe you, sure."

Ivan will accept that, and probably go with it more than Napoleon expected. He's a simple man like that. "But I'm going to need a different name for you -- twin-Clark is going to get confusing."

[smoothaf]

The temptation to introduce himself with his real name is high. But he has a low view on Ivan's ability to keep his mouth shut.

"Nathaniel Saunders, if you insist on something other than twin-Clark."

One day he is going to lock Ivan and Illya in the same room and watch what happens.