Lara Croft (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
rraidergirl) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thisavrou_log2016-02-09 10:06 pm
rraidergirl) wrote in thisavrou_log2016-02-09 10:06 pm
Entry tags:
[open] I'm alive I'm alive
Who: Lara and YOU!
When: After the ship leaves Eimiri, several days after this grim business, time is irrelevant and not the boss of me
Where: Everywhere, but mostly between midnight and 4am.
What: It''s very peaceful and quiet and Lara is failing rather spectacularly to cope.
Warnings: Violent flashbacks! Tag headers containing thread specific warnings! Uncalled for dramatics and a needless amount of prompts below the cut!
State of Mind (wildcard)
She hasn't slept. It's less of a problem at this point and more of a fact. She hasn't slept. There should be no reason for it, especially now that they're up and away from the planet and the related madness, but still. Yamatai looms. Lara dreams. Long shadows, heavy rain, small bloody children and Himiko, face twisted in a smile that looks almost like Sam.
Yamatai looms and Lara does not sleep, but ghosts tug at her heels, stepping soft behind her through the corridors. She thinks, probably, she must look mad, prowling through dimmed corridors, eyes hollowed and shadowed, looking for something to distract her. She is at least hesitant to approach other people. She knows she's not at her best and... there's other things. Hands reaching for her, bullets and knives and fire. She takes too loud a breath and for a long moment, doesn't move.
Where's Waldo (wildcard)
The problem with deciding not to sleep (not that this is necessarily a conscious decision, she just simply... isn't) is that eventually the body overcomes the will. Lara sleeps. In brief spurts, barely longer than a few hours at a time. She tries to do it out of the way, but it's rather hit or miss. She tries to keep moving, but there are moments where she has to sit still and that's when she sleeps.
It's could almost be a game: what deeply inappropriate place has Lara managed to fall asleep this time? Next to her food in the cafeteria? On the library floor, surrounded by stacks of open books? Curled up on the observation deck? On top of a spare crate of uniforms in the cargo bay? Wherever it is, someone might want to wake her up.
Midnight Swim
By the ship clock, it's nearly 3am. The rec room is empty and even if it weren't, Lara would be hard pressed to care. She had gotten a few extra sets of clothes on Eimiri, but one of those was definitely not a swim suit. This also doesn't stop her. She strips down to her underwear and slides into the pool. That this part is empty is something of a comfort. She doesn't know what she would say to someone right now.
The water is warm and stinks of chlorine. She does laps till her arms and legs burn, then flips to her back to float. In a moment, she'll turn back over and start again.
When: After the ship leaves Eimiri, several days after this grim business, time is irrelevant and not the boss of me
Where: Everywhere, but mostly between midnight and 4am.
What: It''s very peaceful and quiet and Lara is failing rather spectacularly to cope.
Warnings: Violent flashbacks! Tag headers containing thread specific warnings! Uncalled for dramatics and a needless amount of prompts below the cut!
State of Mind (wildcard)
She hasn't slept. It's less of a problem at this point and more of a fact. She hasn't slept. There should be no reason for it, especially now that they're up and away from the planet and the related madness, but still. Yamatai looms. Lara dreams. Long shadows, heavy rain, small bloody children and Himiko, face twisted in a smile that looks almost like Sam.
Yamatai looms and Lara does not sleep, but ghosts tug at her heels, stepping soft behind her through the corridors. She thinks, probably, she must look mad, prowling through dimmed corridors, eyes hollowed and shadowed, looking for something to distract her. She is at least hesitant to approach other people. She knows she's not at her best and... there's other things. Hands reaching for her, bullets and knives and fire. She takes too loud a breath and for a long moment, doesn't move.
Where's Waldo (wildcard)
The problem with deciding not to sleep (not that this is necessarily a conscious decision, she just simply... isn't) is that eventually the body overcomes the will. Lara sleeps. In brief spurts, barely longer than a few hours at a time. She tries to do it out of the way, but it's rather hit or miss. She tries to keep moving, but there are moments where she has to sit still and that's when she sleeps.
It's could almost be a game: what deeply inappropriate place has Lara managed to fall asleep this time? Next to her food in the cafeteria? On the library floor, surrounded by stacks of open books? Curled up on the observation deck? On top of a spare crate of uniforms in the cargo bay? Wherever it is, someone might want to wake her up.
Midnight Swim
By the ship clock, it's nearly 3am. The rec room is empty and even if it weren't, Lara would be hard pressed to care. She had gotten a few extra sets of clothes on Eimiri, but one of those was definitely not a swim suit. This also doesn't stop her. She strips down to her underwear and slides into the pool. That this part is empty is something of a comfort. She doesn't know what she would say to someone right now.
The water is warm and stinks of chlorine. She does laps till her arms and legs burn, then flips to her back to float. In a moment, she'll turn back over and start again.
no subject
"Oh." That's funny. "No wonder you're freaking out. Literally anyone could be a maniac out to kill you..." Including someone like Chara. Lucky for her they've decided to postpone their plans for a little while, but the same can't be said for anyone else in her life. She's probably even scared of her roommates, and rightly so. They were probably awful, even if not in obvious ways. That was how humans worked.
no subject
She hesitates, wondering if she should really push it this far. Chara, for whatever else they are, is still a child. But... "I suppose when you kill enough people, you get a sense of who's like you."
no subject
They shrug a little, as though to dislodge a blanket that they never wanted. "Maybe. I dunno." Is she talking about them? They hope not. They study her again, thinking about the way she jumped off the machine, and the way she talks, and the far off look in her eye when thinking back.
"You can guess a lot about a person's LOVE, I guess."
no subject
"LOVE?" Not love, but rather an entierly different concept.
Fifty-fifty chance Chara would give them a straight answer. Or any answer.
no subject
It's an oversimplification, and they could explain more, but they close their mouth instead. There's a line between actually friendly and--well, whatever it is that they're being, and they want to keep that barrier where it is. She's different; that doesn't mean she's a friend.
no subject
Likewise, she's not sure how to categorize what this is. Not companionship, but... Familiarity. "That seems like a dangerous thing to guess at."
no subject
Like the shadow of some great sea-creature passing beneath a ship, an odd look flickers through Chara's eyes. It's gone just as quickly, and they start picking at a thread in their sleeve, now bored.
no subject
"I suppose that is true," she says finally, "There is a line, though. Most people have one." She doesn't know how to describe that. She thought Reyes might have shot her a few times back on the island, fear and anger and grief wracking the poor woman. Reyes was strong though. Lara wonders if she could have held back if their positions had been reversed, if it seemed like Reyes had been standing between Lara and survival. She likes to think she would.
no subject
"Hey," The cycle in the machine under them changes again. They shift until they're sitting more comfortably, leaning on one hand. "Where did you used to live? On earth?" It's a subject change, but it's also genuine curiosity.
no subject
Lara nods, "That's right. I was living in London before I was brought here. I grew up there as well." More or less. She inclines her head to Chara, suddenly equally curious. "And you?"
no subject
Not soon. They study her carefully. "You didn't get all that stuff we were just talking about from there, did you." Their gut has always been good with answers. The real problem came in showing their work. "It's too nice a place." No serious killers could live there. They'd be driven off, like animals losing their habitat.
no subject
"Not everywhere," she begins, slowly, "Where I grew up, yes. My family was-- Is well off." As to the second question... "I learned a lot of things before I killed someone the first time, I don't know if that made it easier. But no, the things we were talking about I didn't learn in London. I learned it on an island called Yamatai."
no subject
Not that that's saying much. The most Chara can tell is that the name doesn't sound English. Or does it? It could be spelled with all sorts of letters that can't be heard, or perhaps weighted with the press of some strange and international history. Chara drums their heel on the machine below a couple of times, thinking about it.
"What was it like, there?"
no subject
"Like a nightmare," she says finally. "Yamatai was an island hidden by storms that seemed to spring from nowhere, as if summoned. The ships that wrecked there, the people that had survived were led by a twisted man. They were ruthless and merciless..." And so was she, when she got right down to it. Would she have been the same, given enough time on the island? If Sam hadn't been the key to the ritual?
no subject
They say this without a hint of irony. Wizards. It was just as well that they'd all but died out in Chara's world, after the terrible things they'd done. Maybe they would've been useful if their goal had actually been to hasten things along, but from the sounds of it they'd only ever wanted humanity to come out on top, and monsters out in the gutter. Whoever these assholes on that island were, they're at least that bad.
no subject
"There was a woman, Himiko. The first and last queen of Yamatai. Legend said she had ruled for centuries before the island disappeared in the storms. It was said that she was a woman of incredible power." Lara taps her fingers again then stills and looks up at Chara with a slight, dry smile, "As you might have guessed, there was far more truth to the legends than we expected."
no subject
Chara considers this for a moment, then looks at Lara. "Did you kill her?"
no subject
The question makes her pause. Finally, she nods again, "Yes, I did."
no subject
Speaking of. "Sounds like she deserved it," they remark. Needed it, they don't say.
no subject
"They'd taken-- There was a girl on our expedition, my best friend. The Solarii found out she was the next vessel for Himiko's soul." A low, dull throb of anger for that, the sight of Sam tied to the stake as the flames and smoke began to build around her. "I couldn't let that happen."
no subject
There's a subtle shift to the look in Chara's eyes. Lara's still a horrible person, sure, but these thoughts have made a difference. "... Good."
The machine underneath them finishes its last cycle. Chara twitches, glancing down, and doesn't make to leave just yet.
no subject
After a long moment, she slides off her machine, landing softly. Whatever had kept there, having this conversation, feels as though it's slipping out of her hands. "I'm going to see if I can get some sleep in an actual bed."