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thisavrou_log2016-12-20 01:23 pm
backsassin) wrote in thisavrou_log2016-12-20 01:23 pm
Entry tags:
all this time i've been chasing down a lie (closed)
Who: Zam Wesell, J, and Obi-wan
When: Throughout the month of December
Where: Camp and the surrounding area
What: Zam knows they'll either make it to Bel's universe alive or get spat back into their own universe as a corpse. Coping ensues.
Warnings: Alcohol, probably existential angst
week one: all my life’s wrapped up in today (closed to J)
[It’s been a day since the ship crashed and still all Zam can think about is the sight of it burning.
She’d complained bitterly about life on the ship while it was still space-worthy, but now that they’re leaving it behind in pieces, she feels a strange sense of loss settling over her. That ship had been her home for the past two years. Sometimes, she even thought of it as an afterlife -- maybe not the nicest afterlife, but it beat oblivion, and most spiritually-minded people would likely agree that it was far better than what she deserved.
Now that she can no longer depend on the Moira as her own personal purgatory, she’ll actually have to start thinking about the future. And that has never been something she’s dealt well with.
It’s why she’s now outside J’s tent after the crew has set up for the night, rustling the thin material to get the attention of the woman inside.]
J? You up?
week three: everyone knows, if you can, let it go (closed to Obi-wan)
[Zam gets more restless as time passes. The captains tell them they’re getting closer to the hub and that means one of two things: either the start of a new life in a new universe or an end that should’ve come two year agos in a Coruscant alleyway.
Either way, unlike the majority of her crewmates, Zam’s not really going “home.” She tries, stubbornly, to convince herself it’s for the best. She thinks of the news she’s heard from those who had lived through her galaxy’s future: war, genocide, the rise of a tyrant empire… All she’s doing, she tells herself, is leaving early before the rush.
...Of course, there’s still the problem of the people she’s leaving behind. Zam has never been great at not having attachments, that core tenet that so many bounty hunters adhere to. Maybe she’d still be alive in her own universe if she had. At the very least, the glimpse she’d seen through the timeslip wouldn’t bother her so much.
But it does and eventually she has to try and do something about it. Stars know Zam’s asked the older of the Jedi here for too many favors over the past months, but she can hardly help that his apprentice doesn’t want anything to do with her.
She sends Obi-wan a message through her TAB during the evening, when most people should be finishing their duties.:]
I need to speak with you. House with red roof to the north of camp, in the next hour?
When: Throughout the month of December
Where: Camp and the surrounding area
What: Zam knows they'll either make it to Bel's universe alive or get spat back into their own universe as a corpse. Coping ensues.
Warnings: Alcohol, probably existential angst
week one: all my life’s wrapped up in today (closed to J)
[It’s been a day since the ship crashed and still all Zam can think about is the sight of it burning.
She’d complained bitterly about life on the ship while it was still space-worthy, but now that they’re leaving it behind in pieces, she feels a strange sense of loss settling over her. That ship had been her home for the past two years. Sometimes, she even thought of it as an afterlife -- maybe not the nicest afterlife, but it beat oblivion, and most spiritually-minded people would likely agree that it was far better than what she deserved.
Now that she can no longer depend on the Moira as her own personal purgatory, she’ll actually have to start thinking about the future. And that has never been something she’s dealt well with.
It’s why she’s now outside J’s tent after the crew has set up for the night, rustling the thin material to get the attention of the woman inside.]
J? You up?
week three: everyone knows, if you can, let it go (closed to Obi-wan)
[Zam gets more restless as time passes. The captains tell them they’re getting closer to the hub and that means one of two things: either the start of a new life in a new universe or an end that should’ve come two year agos in a Coruscant alleyway.
Either way, unlike the majority of her crewmates, Zam’s not really going “home.” She tries, stubbornly, to convince herself it’s for the best. She thinks of the news she’s heard from those who had lived through her galaxy’s future: war, genocide, the rise of a tyrant empire… All she’s doing, she tells herself, is leaving early before the rush.
...Of course, there’s still the problem of the people she’s leaving behind. Zam has never been great at not having attachments, that core tenet that so many bounty hunters adhere to. Maybe she’d still be alive in her own universe if she had. At the very least, the glimpse she’d seen through the timeslip wouldn’t bother her so much.
But it does and eventually she has to try and do something about it. Stars know Zam’s asked the older of the Jedi here for too many favors over the past months, but she can hardly help that his apprentice doesn’t want anything to do with her.
She sends Obi-wan a message through her TAB during the evening, when most people should be finishing their duties.:]
I need to speak with you. House with red roof to the north of camp, in the next hour?
no subject
[ An unaltered clone, Obi-Wan recalls, which in of itself is saying something, as the young man proved to be quite a thorn in Kenobi's side not only on Kamino, but elsewhere in the universe. His mouth twists into a frown. ]
I'm afraid we don't have the most... positive history, but I do know who he is. We've met on several occasions.
no subject
You were both on Geonosis, [she says without thinking. It takes her a moment to remember that given her time of death, it probably doesn’t make much sense for her to know such a thing.] I saw both of you. When the ship was going through the timeslip.
[But Obi-wan had said he'd encountered Boba several times, not just once. Sometimes Zam forgets that he’s ahead of her in time back home. A troubled expression crosses her face and she looks away, muttering.] I don’t know. Maybe it’s too late...
no subject
He shifts slightly, stroking thoughtfully at his beard, his mind drifting back to Geonosis. He has no fond memories to recall, only an excessive and exhausting stress that has fairly consistently persisted since.
Obi-Wan finally nods. ]
I followed him there, yes. From Kamino, where I tracked his father after he killed you. There was a battle. He survived it, Jango did not.
no subject
[She shouldn’t let herself get side-tracked by the memory, much less in a way that might antagonize the person who’s agreed to help her, but she can’t quite stop the question from escaping:] Why didn’t anyone do anything on Geonosis? There were so many Jedi and none of you… You all just let him wander off!
[Whatever the Jedi thinks of Boba, Zam had only ever known him as a child, and if he wasn’t hers, he was still one of the closest people Zam had to family – certainly moreso than Jango in the end. Of course Zam is angry at what had happened to him.
...But it’s not an anger she can expect Obi-wan to answer to. She isn’t sure who to blame, whether the Jedi, the Republic, or Jango himself, but Obi-wan’s only crime that she knows for sure was being there at the time and being in front of her now.
She exhales slowly.] Sorry. It’s not like I can put this all on you, but… [She gives a slight shake of her head, expression still bitter.] We went to really stupid lengths to keep him safe. It’s… not easy, knowing it was all for nothing.
no subject
I'm not entirely certain, but I don't believe anyone was left on Geonosis. I can't say what lead Boba to the life he was leading when I met him last, but I can say someone at the Order would have tried to help, Zam.
[ He frowns. ]
Would he have accepted help?