[open] you're a picture of the devil's daughter

[lavelly]

Who: Lavellan and YOU, FRIENDO
When: End of July to the start of the August plot
Where: You pick, I'm flex. Lavellan is going to be all over the place trying to avoid people he knows.
What: Lavellan lost some control of his magic as resurrection damage. The result: shitposting.
Warnings: Silliness, secondhand embarrassment

Maybe you're at a restaurant. Maybe you're having a nice walk in the park, trying to avoid eye contact with the mistrustful natives. Maybe you're commiting petty larceny. Whatever you're doing, you're minding your own business, and certainly not prepared to get hit in the face with a magical prank.

Well, that's just too bad, buddy.

You may find yourself dealing with one (or more!) of several different bizarre experiences:

• You're pretty sure that meal you ordered was perfectly hot, a moment ago (or maybe it was cold, as it happens). Whichever it was, it's very suddenly the opposite now.


• Everything you touch shocks you. Not like a static electricity problem, you get an actual zap of pain. Not a bad one! But it quickly gets really annoying.


• Everyone around you is starting to move very quickly, to a superhuman degree. Or is it that you're slowing down? Every second stretches longer and everything around you accelerates as you gradually... come... to... a... stop.


• Your shirt is on fire. Or your pants. Or your hair. Sorry about that.


• There's a sense of dread. Everything that was perfectly innocent a moment ago seems like a threat, now. That flower right there? Fuck that flower. You want to be far away from that flower. Just look at it. It's sinister.


• Feel free to play fast and loose with any of these abilities if none of the above appeal to you! Use your imagination. Have fun with it. I'll roll with whatever.

Whatever it is that happens to you, there's someone in your periphery--maybe you know him, maybe you don't. But after a few moments it will pass, and he'll approach you, running his hands in his hair and generally seeming totally discombobulated.

"Sorry. Sorry, I didn't mean--sorry. I don't know why this is happening."

[I will match format, go with whatever you feel comfortable with! And if you want a specific prompt or have any questions about how this stuff works, feel free to hit me up via PM or at listen.]

Comments

Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening me

[a_shadow]

[ It's a beautiful, clear day, despite the cold and the darkness, so Tex decides to go out for a jog after bundling up appropriately. Kauto 1 was spared some of the disasters that befell other regions, so she's glad to be living here.

It's about twenty minutes into her excursion that she seems to notice a crackling in the air. Before she has a chance to react, she comes to realize that her body has been hit by lightning—and has gone instantly unconscious. She's bodiless, being displayed as her armored hologram. ]

Fuck.

[ She can't exactly jostle her body to wake, and it remains unconscious as she tries to reanimate it.

Isn't this just peachy. ]

[sleepdarts]

( Luckily, though whether for Ana or Lavellan we'll never know, it isn't anything of Ana that is on fire, though sadly the book that she'd been looking in spontaneously sets alight.

The notes she'd made, a detail of some of the recent events... well, it was probably better that not just everyone could read it, though it had been nice to have a record.

Considering this place, and she's seen things set on fire before, Ana's looking up from the book once the fire is out, looking for someone nearby. It isn't necessarily Lavellan that Ana searches for, but he is a possible suspect...

Though when he himself runs over. Well, she should have known really )

Are you against research?

( JOKE. Or is it )

8 unbelievable things you never knew about fire

[inconsequence]

[They've not been back to the house. They've been digging up bulbs at the edge of R3 for the past...several days...as though bent on hoarding every plantable plant in the vicinity. One more thing they can uproot and destroy, they think idly, tearing up one of the tulip-like growths up from the roots and scowling at it.]

[It promptly bursts into flame.]

[Chara drops it immediately, backing away with eyes narrowed. They turn back to their appropriated wheelbarrow full of the stolen bulbs, only to discover that one of them has already sprung alight - and that therefore, the rest will soon follow.]

[They should probably flee, at this particular point. That would be their cue, would it not?]

[But instead they elect to simply stand there, and watch, as all their hard-earned plant matter goes up in flames.]

galileo (galileo) galileo (galileo)

[lavelly]

[Lavellan skids to a halt where he was running to intercept Tex as soon as he realized what he'd sent arcing toward her. Not that he'd have had any hope in outrunning lightning, but you can't fault him for trying. Something settles low and horrible in his stomach when he sees her collapse.]

Shit.

[He bends to kneel next to her body, panic mounting with every second. Is she dead? Did he kill her? Will she come back too, or is that only in special circumstances? Why does he keep fucking up literally everything he tries to do??

Pay no attention to the hologram standing in midair, like, right there.]

[lavelly]

[Lavellan's heart drops when he sees who it is. As if he doesn't already owe these people enough, he has to keep causing them difficulty like this.

He's uncharacteristically subdued as he approaches.]

No, I--that was an accident. Is there anything I can do to replace it?

[lavelly]

[Of course Chara has to run into him while he's struggling with this. Of course he has to do something to harm them further.

He stays a good distance away, not wanting to startle them into running away again--but that hadn't actually been them, had it? Maybe he should just leave them alone, but he can't.]

I'm sorry.

[It feels hollow, but there's nothing really else to say.]

I'll help you find more.

[a_shadow]

[ Tex stands by, expecting him to shake her body or something to get it to come out of its moment of unconsciousness. When he doesn't seem to be doing anything, she speaks. ]

What are you doing?

[inconsequence]

[Of course it is he who is responsible. Him - and their gaze does not pin him with the same fervor as would be, perhaps, expected. He sat idly by and awaited the strike of a blade that did not come. He watched their eyes fill with black and then - ]

[They cannot look at him.]

It is no matter.

[Spoken to the smoking pile of burning plant matter - as if it would notice, or care.]

They were not mine to begin with.

[lavelly]

Plants don't really belong to anyone.

[He sits on the ground next to Chara, not looking at them either, and watches the bulbs burn in silence for a few moments. Something black and ugly settles in his throat as he draws up his knees and folds his arms over them.

It's like a surreal representation of the direction of his own life the past several months, looking at this sad little brushfire.

He's not even all that distressed by his own loss of control, really. There's an air of inevitability to the whole scenario, quietly watching some plants burn next to a child who apparently harbors some desire to murder him.]

I really didn't mean to, Chara. I know you don't believe me, but I'm telling the truth.

[inconsequence]

[Of course they do not belong to anyone, because Chara was picking them from the ground to plant on their own - on someone else's soil. Simply because they could. Because they're a truly wretched creature with a penchant for destruction, no matter what it is they choose to do with it.]

[The wheelbarrow's metal has begun to heat with a bright orange glow. Chara regards it dully without truly seeing it.]

I did say it is no matter.

[...]

Though I suppose I must question what said plants may have done to offend you.

[lavelly]

[At her voice Lavellan jerks his head up in surprise in a way that'd probably be funny in different circumstances. Then he gapes at her for a good moment or so.

To his credit, he recovers fairly well. He's encountered enough bizarre things in Thisavrou to stop making assumptions about these things.]

Ah... Texas? What... did I do?

[lavelly]

[He'd just said he didn't mean to. Was that supposed to be a joke?

Whatever it is, Lavellan doesn't bother defending himself or, really, responding in any way. Instead he pulls himself to his feet, wearily, and puts out the flames with a brush of frost.

Now the bulbs are soggy on top of being burnt. This just gets more and more depressing.]

What were you collecting them for?

[inconsequence]

To line my grave.

[There heralds a fraction of their typical vitriol, their gaze snapping up to meet his, albeit briefly. Briefly. Their eyes fall back to survey the smoldering plant matter. He is - ]
[Too difficult to see.]
[It is no matter.]

And what, pray tell, were you intending to set on fire?

[lavelly]

[Lavellan doesn't have the energy to pretend to be disturbed. By now, he'd come to expect a response like that from Chara.

Funny, that they're becoming predictable. But Lavellan is tired of himself more than anything.]

I was... experimenting. [He flexes his fingers, more for himself than for Chara.] I've been having some problems since--

[Uh. Change of subject.]

So what's the reason for your untimely death this time?

cw frank discussion of suicide

[inconsequence]

[Since...?]

[He does not deign to tell them, and they will not push; it is not their place, nor do they particularly care. If he is experimenting with fire, it is only a shame that he did not succeed in setting them alight instead.]

[They smile, a blithe lift of the corners of their mouth. At last - a topic of discussion with which they can be comfortable.]

I was thinking a nice bullet to the head. I'm sure someone among the Savrii would be willing to provide. [But they don't stop there, oh no. Now that they've started, they see no reason to stop!]

Failing that - perhaps a long fall off a tall building! Though I would not put stock in such things. They do tend to go rather poorly, in my experience. [Instead of killing yourself, you might very well end up destroying an entire nation and murdering the crown prince overnight!] I could always try for asphyxiation. I'm sure the lack of atmosphere in space would be willing to provide plenty!

[They're starting to sound a shade...]
[manic?]

What do you think?

cw not... discouraging it...

[lavelly]

[He takes a deep breath, then sighs. The whole time he doesn't turn his gaze from the smoldering wheelbarrow.

He should be telling Chara that they're being ridiculous. That killing themselves won't solve anything. That so many people would be sad if they died, even if they aren't convinced of it.

But fuck, he's so tired. And who's to say that their death would even stick?]

I think if you really wanted to you'd have done it already.

[Or maybe not. After all, he's still here.]

[inconsequence]

Do you?

[They half-turn; it's easier to face him like this, the smile glistening on their cheeks, cutting the faltering, the nervous remnants of their last meeting. Of that - complete and utter failure, in every possible sense of the world.]

[They're still smiling.]

I think that you may find yourself surprised, sir, when such attempts are met with implausible failure, time and time again.

[A fistful of flowers never would truly be enough to mend all they've broken.]
[...]
[ha ha]

[sleepdarts]

It wasn't that important.

( And she makes her tone a little more obvious, making sure he knows that she's not being serious, or cross with him )

But you should find a new way to greet people.

[a_perfect_end]

Listen!

Do...d'you smell something? It's definitely there, equal parts Paul Mitchell and eau du brush fire, and--and is that just a touch of hair gel?

How would he even know; Programs don't really have a sense of smell.

Touch, however, has him shrieking in short order, inhuman reaction time rocketing him face-first into the nearest birdbath.

"Who the glitch're you?" Tilted through a soggy wall of sulk and bubbles.

What is the point of being vertical.

His beautiful, beautiful, perfect mane has been assaulted.

for shepshep

[lavelly]

[He's not on the EN-line for any particular reason. It just lets him be in motion without any effort on his part, gives him new things to stare at dully as time goes by. Maybe he'll never move again. Maybe he'll just stay here until he starves to death. He's stopped wondering why his magic doesn't work properly anymore, stopped trying to make sense of it. Stopped trying to make sense of anything. Instead he'll just exist until he stops.

He doesn't speak or make eye contact with anyone else in the car, and nobody tries to do the same with him. Some probably know who he is, but it doesn't matter. He doesn't know how long he's been there, either, until something makes him look up--maybe it's a noise, a voice, or just something feels wrong enough to make him react--and he realizes that it's night, and the car is empty.

And Shepard has just stepped on.]

[squadgoals]

[More fires to put out.

At least, in this case, it wasn't literal ones. A combination of a hand extinguisher and automated systems had done the bulk of the work, there. The rest had just been a matter of waiting for the embers to flame down. Now, she was left just scraping up the remains of her business, attempting to reorganize it into a workable machine again. Hemorrhaging money, plus the destruction of all her apartment's worldly possessions, had left her on the lower side of the senc scale.

Easy come, easy go.

And now here she was, on her way home to the most unlikely combination of roommates. At some point, she'd have to pick up food — Nihlus had begun to be extremely insistent about "three square meals", like some sort of public service announcement vid popup.

She leaves the office late, as late as possible, before rest hours kick in, but before last train. Her shadow had been... for lack of a better word, everywhere. Where once she'd been known as an upstanding citizen, now locals cringed away, dark looks shading their expressions.

Slipping into a seat, her whole body collapses, staring forward, unseeing. Forward. Always forward.

And Lavellan, right across.

It takes a solid handful of moments for her to blink, to click and recognize his presence — and then decide what to do with it.]

Hey.

shock me baby one more time

[shiro2hero]

[Finally -- allowed out of the hospital and back into his shuttle. Back to work. He's still limping, his shoulder is still sore, and breathing too hard or fast still hurts his ribs, but hey! Back to the shuttle.]

[Which immediately zaps him. Hard.]

[There's an undignified yell, and he pulls his hand back, staring at metal fingers like they've just betrayed him.]

What --? Seriously?

[Time to try again. With the same effect. The other hand. Same thing.]

... really.

[lavelly]

[How is it that so much has changed again since they last spoke? He looks into her face and he all he can think of is black eyes, or her body crushed beneath rubble.

He doesn't move for a long moment. Shepard might be forgiven for thinking he's unconscious with his eyes open. There's no point in responding with something equally inane. But there's so much to say, and yet nothing he wants to. Where does he start?

His voice creaks like he hasn't spoken in years. It's like he doesn't have the energy anymore to do anything other than whisper.]

I remembered something. We were in the center at the same time.

[squadgoals]

[She stares at him, watching his face, his movements — then listening to his words, papery, dry, like a book's pages fluttering in the wind.

Shepard nods reactively, brow twitching at the obvious statement, a whisper of confusion at the whiplash of his strange response.]

Of course we were. You made your attack while I was still inside.

[a_shadow]

[ What did he do? The hologram tilts its head slightly. ]

Unless the lightning was your fault, you didn't do anything. But it knocked me out of my body.

[ She doesn't explain about that further. Those who know she's an AI understand, and those who don't—well, they can ask questions if they don't understand. ]

You want to try waking it up?