thisavrou_log | (no subject)

Who: Declan & St. Monmouth folks, or anyone.
When: late March
Where: St. Monmouth
What: Declan realizes that even running away to another planet doesn't solve any of his problems.
Warnings: language. will update as threads progress

[Monmouth looks so peaceful this late at night. The firelights, the dream trees, the flowers that always seem to glow. They all lend an air of magic to the whole place and all Declan can think about is that none of it is really worth it. None of anything their father had was worth it, and now it's all rushing in and catching up to Ronan as well.

The last thing Declan feels is peaceful. Back in Virginia he could manage it all, it was his life's work. But here? He doesn't know if even God himself could get rid of these demons.

Sitting on the front steps of his newly dreamt up house, rubbing at the fresh bruise along his jaw, he is thankful for one thing, at least: the never ending alcohol in this dreamt up flask.]

closed to Gansey

[Declan gives himself a day, because even he has to regroup sometimes and this one's a doozy. If there was something immediate he could do, he'd already be doing it, but demons aren't part of his expertise. Maybe he should have paid better attention in Church. Maybe that's what he needs right now, too.

But other than church, there's Richard Gansey, who always seems to be able to help when Declan can't quite get there. Declan has always been grateful even if it's less than apparent and he knows Gansey must respect him as well, at least for the most part.

After they fought (the briefest of fights, Gansey might actually be proud, only Declan's face showing any signs that one even took place), Ronan filled him in on whatever he could, but he told Declan to ask Gansey the rest. That Gansey was there at the end. The end. Matthew and Ronan coming undone. He isn't ready to hear the rest of this, but he knows he has to be if he wants to figure out what to do about it. Knocking on Gansey's door, he waits for a reply. ]

(lmk if there's anything else you'd like to do that doesn't fit into this scenario, i'm open!)

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What do you mean you don't get what's going on? [ Adam looks a bit puzzled, he starts fidgeting with his drink. ]

Well....

[Declan starts and then tries to think of the best way to approach this. No judgements... he's not sure how that's actually working out for him]

When I met him, he was coming out of Ronan's room, all...

[Does Adam even know? He's not sure. Ronan isn't the type to cheat, or to spread himself around. He's given Declan plenty of shit for that one. Still, he doesn't want to cause any issues]

I'm not sure how well anyone here knows each other, that's all.

[ Adam stifles a grin, covering his mouth with his hand briefly and then clearing his throat. Well, apparently Declan's run into Andyr at an inopportune time. ]

I was probably in that room too. [ Adam clears his throat and dropping his hand. Mostly, for the moment he's not worried so much about Declan approving of him as he is about Declan approving of Andyr. ]

Ronan really doesn't tell you anything does he?

[It's a good thing Adam is amused but it, because Declan wouldn't know what to do if it ended up being anything else. The whole encounter was a little bit shocking, but Declan tried to take it in stride.

He's really glad he doesn't have any water to spit out, though and he feels uneasy about it for reasons he can't really put his finger on]

Oh. Well that's something. And no, we really haven't had a chance to talk about this since everything else came up. Is this some sort of survival thing?

Andyr is our boyfriend. [Adam and Ronan are one unit and Andyr is theirs.]

I'm not sure what you mean by survival. I don't think he's a succubus or anything.

What, like a threesome?

[Well this is a conversation he never thought he'd be having. Not about Ronan of all people and definitely not with Adam. He rubs his forehead, dropping the rest of his slice down on his plate]

No, I meant, like in those apocalyptic movies where people do what it takes to survive. New laws, new family dynamics, survival of the fittest type of thing.

[Or maybe when Ronan discovered himself, he just really discovered himself]

[ Adam shrugs because put like that, he's not sure it's the most accurage way of describing them. It sounds trite. ]

It's just how things happened.

[ Well, it didn't just happen there was a lot of work and trouble along the way. ]

[Declan doesn't really know how else to put it. He can't imagine a relationship like this could realistically sustain itself and he wonders how in the hell someone like Ronan, who would constantly shame him for his relationships, would get into something like this. So he figures it's for survival reasons. Everything he had to go through here]

And you're all okay with this? How did the other guy even get mixed into it? I thought... well, you and Ronan. I thought that was... hm. I'm not even sure.

So between work and two people, you must be exhausted.

[ Adam shifts uncomfortably at the questions that Declan returns with. He wonders if again he's told Declan things that Ronan would get pissed about. He runs his fingers through his hair and decides he really shouldn't say anything at all.

Maybe he shouldn't be talking to Declan at all, he should've learned his lesson last time. ]

Maybe you should ask Ronan about all that.

[ Adam says it quietly and it's not likely Ronan would talk about it or that Declan would ask, he thinks but at least it makes it clear he doesn't want to answer himself. ]

Not anymore exhausted than I've always been. [ Three jobs and school and then taking care of the leylines. He has always had a lot of responsibilities. ]

[He sighs, watching Adam. He's really just trying to have a conversation. To understand it. Especially after Adam told him about not wanting Ronan to be with Jesse. He just can't figure it all out. Maybe he's not meant to, it seems]

Yeah, sure. I'll ask Ronan. But you know, if you two are having a thing, it would be nice to talk to my brother's... boyfriend? Partner? Whatever you call yourselves. It would be nice to be able to talk to you too. I overreacted the other day. For good reason, at the time. I'm sure we both just want to keep Ronan safe. I'm not interrogating you, Adam.

[Declan eyes Adam, pursing his lips]

But all the exhaustion, it's not necessary here, is it? Do what you love, you told me.

[ Adam exhales and he knows he's hedging more than strictly necessary. it's different with Andyr because there'd never been any betrayal, there'd never been lies by omission when it came to Andyr. They'd had their issues but there were deeper issues when it came to Jesse, that Adam doesn't think even Ronan really understands past the point that he hurt Adam. ]

Boyfriend. Boyfriends.

[ It's a small olive branch, but one all the same. ]

It's not necessary. [ He loved his work but the exhaustion is more due to him using work as a form of escape than anything else. It doesn't help that sleep is something that's difficult for him by all accounts. ] It's just easier to focus on work sometimes.

[Declan knows he won't really get to know the ins and outs of whatever is going on between everyone- he's always been just outside of it all, looking in from the surface. But now they're closer here and he and Ronan are trying to mend things. He wants to get to know these pieces of Ronan's life.

He wants to get to know Adam]

Boyfriends. Alright. I'm still learning. And... I'm okay with it all. I just want to make sure you know that. I was never really big on the whole Bible aspect of things.

[He's not sure if Adam cares, or if he's thinking about that part or not, but Declan had already had this conversation with himself, with God a while ago. He's sure he's done far worse things in his life that the Bible wouldn't approve of either]

Listen, I was thinking. If you ever need a hand... [He gives a small shrug] I could use something to work on from time to time as well. I miss school, I miss work, my internship.

[ Adam doesn't know what to say so he just shrugs. It's not the bible stuff he'd been worried with to begin with but the whole Adam's trailer trash sort of thing that he's worried about. That insecurity isn't one to be overwritten easily or quickly. ]

I don't think helping me with my work would be all that interesting for you. [ Besides, the Lynches were much better at driving cars than trying to fix things. ]

You haven't found anything yet?

[Declan isn't really sure what Adam is worried about in terms of himself, because he's not all that open. It's like pulling teeth- which he supposes makes sense if Adam is in the company of Ronan.

The trailer trash thing might've bothered Declan for a moment, a while back, but not really in the sense that Adam thinks it did. It was more about Ronan not getting the hell out of Singer's Falls, or Henrietta, with Adam possibly holding him back. But now he knows it wasn't really like that at all]

Maybe I'd like to try new things. Now's my chance, right? I haven't really been looking all that hard. I've been very...preoccupied with what's been going on around here.