seeking power, i killed my brother [CLOSED]

[whatshimadayou]

Who: Super Shimada Bros.
When: A week since their arrival.
Where: Genji's room
What: Hanzo tries to stop being an asshole for at least five minutes.
Warnings: Shimada brother angst



Upon arrival, Hanzo had been a storm of emotions.

It had been shortly after he'd just seen Genji -- his brother, the brother he thought he had murdered, for the past ten years he thought he knew the truth and it's almost worse. After his prayers and bizarre meditation, he had found himself in this situation. Far, far from his own planet, lost in the sea of people from so many places and worlds and dimensions.

Trapped, confined within this ship, unable to turn his back on his brother's presence.

A week has been enough time to process things. Though his fury has not dissipated entirely, it has subsided, simmering in his heart instead of burning fiercely.

Hanzo had left his quarters early this morning after his brief routine. He marches down the hall, not needing to go far.

How close they have been physically, but so far.

He knocks on the door noisily.

"Genji!" he snaps, demanding his attention.

Comments

[gluteusexmachina]

The sudden loud rapping jolts Genji from his meditation, and the cybrog has to collect himself before moving to answer the door. It's only as he touches the frame, nearly opening it when he hears that voice. It gives him pause, but only for a second.

The door slides open with a soft hiss, and Genji's visor lights up the contours of his brother's face with a sickly green glow.

"Hanzo." He fights the surprise from his voice, but is not entirely successful.

"What are you- would you... like to come in?"

Honestly, he hadn't expected to see him so soon.

[whatshimadayou]

Like this, he is face to face with Genji once more, faced with the results of his actions. Quietly, Hanzo looks over his brother, thinking to himself what had to be replaced as a result of what he'd done. Every stroke of his blade against his brother, and the final blow at the end of their duel.

The brutality of his actions have not escaped him. Not for ten years, not right now.

Hanzo scowls, already feeling like this is a mistake. But he doesn't run.

Instead, he gives a slight bow of his head, and says stiffly, "If you are alone, yes."

[gluteusexmachina]

"I am. I was just finishing with my meditation for today." He says, standing aside to let Hanzo enter before closing the door behind him. The room is so small, as they all are, but Genji's space is tidy and spartan. His sword rests in one corner, and a rumpled photograph stands propped on the nighstand. It's them. Taken very shortly before their father's death.

Genji sets down on a mat he'd placed on the floor, gesturing Hanzo to join him.

"Please, sit. What brings you to see me today? Are you well?"

[whatshimadayou]

There is a brief pause as he looks toward the few belongings that Genji has. The sword, he remembers distinctly; it is not the one that the Shimada clan bestowed upon him. Perhaps it was made for him when he joined Overwatch.

And the photograph. He remembers that picture.

Hanzo's heart sinks, and he tears his eyes away from the items.

"I am fine," he says stiffly, sitting down across from his brother. "We should speak. Should we not? Now that we are here, undoubtedly for quite sometime."

[gluteusexmachina]

"Yes, it looks like we will be stuck together for the foreseeable future." He clears his throat superfluously and folds his hands neatly in his lap. The small room does them no favors. Perhaps walking would have been better, but this affords them privacy.

"We should speak. I would like to hear what you have to say, Hanzo."

He's going to let Hanzo lead this conversation, he came here after all. Genji doesn't have much to say right now. Things will come in time, but letting Hanzo make the first step is important.

[whatshimadayou]

A wave of uncertain, mixed emotions rush through him. Most of it is anger -- at himself, for this situation he's created. For what he's done. He didn't just kill Genji; he took away so much of him. For the past ten years, when he closed his eyes and thought of his brother, he thought of his stupid and confident grin, that ridiculous green hair, and how he'd be late to meetings and training and he'd laugh and fake apologize, like there were no repercussions. He would never listen to his older brother.

Here Genji is, calmer, certain. Held together with cybernetics and metal.

What has Hanzo made him into?

"I want to know what you expect of me," Hanzo says carefully. "You came to me in Hanamura. What do you want to accomplish?"

[gluteusexmachina]

"I came to ask you to join me." Metal digits flex together tighter, the joints pulling just slightly, focusing on the way the mesh feels as it fights to interlock. It's kind of grounding. He would be lying if he said he wasn't anxious.

"I have hopes, but no expectations. I have forgiven you, brother. To dwell on this is a waste. You can do so much more than incense."

[whatshimadayou]

"Your Overwatch," Hanzo says a bit coldly. "The same organization that dismantled the Shimada clan."

Although he does not outright know that Genji head led it, he is aware of what Overwatch had done. It was sometime after he left the clan, but there is a part of him that still wishes he could have held everything together.

He failed everything, miserably.

"A waste?" he hisses. "You were dead. I killed you! How is that to be forgiven?"

[gluteusexmachina]

"Yes. That one. Our clan was a criminal organization at heart. Separate from our family, the clan, the elders were corrupt. Without one of the heirs to lead it, things became imbalanced. However that is something I feel we will not immediately see eye to eye on."

So he'll concede.

"Now I am not. Your actions will contain merit, not your guilt, brother. You can feel as poorly as you like, but it does not change anything. You will just sit and make yourself miserable. I was hoping that by coming to speak to me-"

Well. He was hoping for anything, really.

"That perhaps you wanted to reconcile."

[whatshimadayou]

The topic of their family is already going to be a difficult matter to deal with. Though he is willing to quietly admit that, for right now, it is best left aside. He is displeased with the choice from Overwatch, but ultimately it was his own failing that caused it to fall since he had left.

Nothing could it together if Overwatch picked it apart. And that it did.

"Action. There is nothing that I could do to repair what has happened. No words or choice would change anything." Certainly not how he feels.

Why is he here.

"I do not know you," Hanzo says, struggling to keep how tired he feels from his voice. "You are a different man now. I came to determine if that is a man worth knowing. If that man would let me, as well."

[gluteusexmachina]

It's painful. Of course it is. He'd thought about how this would go many times over, he'd fantasized about telling Hanzo every gory detail of his reconstruction, the anguish and betrayal and how much it hurt. He'd thought about telling Hanzo he forgave him, and they'd hug and everything would go back to normal. Every scenario in between, but he could have never counted for being abducted and trapped in deep space. Having this talk in the tiny cabin. How the talk might be many talks over time, all of them hard and wrenching.

"No, but some things can help set things in motion."

Like an apology. That would be a good place, but Hanzo has to come to it on his own.

"My own worthiness is not in question, Hanzo. I am still Genji, and I am more than willing to let you come to remember me. I have grown up, that is all. You just did not get to see it."

[whatshimadayou]

Despite however much there is a part of him that wants to deny the truth, he remembers toward the end of their last duel in Hanamura. The mask was removed, and he looked into the scarred face revealed, his eyes he knew well. That despite everything, Genji smiled at him in that moment.

Hanzo closes his eyes and his fingers grip his thighs tightly.

He knows who he is. Just that he is not who he was.

Genji has grown up. Before the elders convinced Hanzo to slay his own brother, he tried to coach him, to teach him, to enforce to him to grow and be patient and be better and nothing worked. But now, Genji is this.

Hanzo could not inspire him. No, apparently, all he could do was ruin both of their lives.

"If it is not too much to ask of you."

[gluteusexmachina]

"It is not too much. I am glad to accept you back into my life, if you wish to be part of it." It's strange, feeling heavy and light-headed at the same time. Like his body is on the ground but all of his thoughts are floating around in space.

Genji swallows.

"It will not be easy. If you are willing to try however, I am too."

There's a soft chuff of a laugh.

"You can get to know the new, improved Genji."

[whatshimadayou]

For a moment, he'd almost expected to be refused. A part of him almost wishes that Genji had, really, as if that would somehow help him feel justified, feel validated for this position he'd put them in.

Hanzo closes his eyes and sighs softly, his shoulders sinking.

"I am grateful at your acceptance." He hesitates, then opens his eyes, brows knitted.

"With that said, I suppose I do not know where to begin."

[gluteusexmachina]

"We begin wherever we feel is right. I will begin with telling you again, that I forgive you."

The cyborg gives a slow exhale.

"Do you have anything you have wanted to say to me?"

[whatshimadayou]

There are a hundred things that he has wanted to say. Things he has said every year, infiltrating Shimada castle in order to honor a man he thought he'd killed. But here and now, it is difficult to bring forth the words he should say.

Eventually, he says, "You did not deserve what I did to you."

[gluteusexmachina]

That is good enough for now. The admittance takes a great measure of weight out of the room.

"Thank you." Is all he can say, bowing his head just slightly. It leaves him feeling oddly light now, though he's not sure if Hanzo shares the sentiment.

"I am so glad we can speak like this."