and it seems a lot like flesh is all I got

[hatesimprovising]

Who: Agent Washington, Solid Snake, Dr. Emily Grey, and YOU maybe. if you're interested.
When: the first half of August
Where: various locations
What: just a teeny catch-all. mostly in which Wash openly defies doctors' orders to rest and let his body heal after the mess of July and all it wreaked upon him.
Warnings: injury, blood, talk of slavery, probably more so will update as needed


i bet a lot of me was lost; t's uncrossed and i's undotted | closed to emily grey
[ In all honesty, he's been back on the Moira long enough that he shouldn't be just now doing this. He should have done this about the moment he got back, but after everything that had happened, the last thing he'd wanted to put up with had been doctors. So here Wash is, days after being rescued from slavery and near-constant battles to the death, finally making his way to the medbay.

He's in horrible shape. Has been for over a month now, just getting increasingly worse. First Tex had broken his rib. Then there'd been the battle with the Caducans so soon after that he'd had no time to heal properly. Then he'd been somehow transported off the ship, captured, and sold into slavery where he'd been forced to fight others to the death. He's dotted in all sorts of wounds--stabs, slashes, bruising, various scrapes and scratches, and oh yeah, his rib has still not healed and has been hurting more than it had for the first part of last month. Considering the size of some of these wounds, the lack of stitching and proper care in most of them, and the clear fact that some of them have torn open at least once from movement, he really should have come straight to the medbay. But he's stubborn and really only caving now because of the pain and the fact that a lot of the injuries are impacting his ability to do much of anything.

Limping his way through the medbay door, Wash is doing his best to stand up straight, though he hasn't really been able to since the murderfights had jostled his poor rib around more. One hand is resting on the lower part of his ribcage like that might ease some of the pain while also trying to look completely casual about it. His eyes search the medbay, trying to catch a glimpse of one of the people he knows is a physician, but he's coming up empty. Instead, his gaze comes to rest on a woman nearby and, after scrutinizing her for a long moment, he calls out to her. ]

Is there a doctor around?


i'm open a moment and close when you show it; before you know it, i'm lost at sea | closed to solid snake
[ Bed rest. That's what he's been told, that's what he's supposed to be getting while he lets his body heal. It feels like a death sentence. Laying still, stuck in one place all day... Wash hates it. He's bad enough with downtime as it is, but downtime where he can't keep himself busy? That's more of a problem. It's almost painful. It has his fingers twitching in search of something to do and has his mind wandering, trying to find something to think about, and venturing to areas in his head that he does not want to deal with.

Needless to say, against doctors' orders, he's left his bed and the room a few times now, just for a chance to sneak in some distraction, even if only in the form of a walk around the ship. Sure, laying in bed all the time has given him a lot of opportunity to spend time with his cats, but that's the only upside to it, and it's unfortunately not enough to keep him in place. Most of the time, he only does it while Snake and Alphys are out of the room, just to avoid any chastising that may occur, at least from the former, however, on this particular occasion when the door to the room slides open and Wash makes his return from his brief journey... he's met with the sight of Snake.

For a second, he simply stands in the doorway awkwardly, like he's some teenager who's just been caught sneaking out by a parent. Except no, he's a grown-ass man and he's perfectly capable of making his own decisions. Shaking off what awkwardness he can, Wash steps the rest of the way into the room and shuts the door, pointedly removing the hand that has been resting against his torso so as to look perfectly healthy. ]

I thought you were out.

[ It's noted as though it's not a big deal, like he hadn't been planning on getting back before Snake, and he looks down at the cats at his feet as they approach, rather than at the other man. He at least knows better than to lean down to give the cats attention, wanting to avoid the pain that would bring, but it doesn't do much for his 'I'm fine, don't worry about me' case, which he's been trying to make this whole time. ]


and the story unfolds; you should take my life, you should take my soul | ota
[ The changes incited by the returning captain don't bother Wash all that much, all things considered. It's more what he's used to. The last eight years of his life have been spent in the strict regime of the military where the need to conserve as much as possible is prevalent. Granted, Project Freelancer had been a bit more lax about some things than most military programs, but not so much so that the current changes frustrate him. He's even in favour of the efficiency that's been brought in, especially if it means getting them home faster.

Still injured from all of the events of the last month, but at least finally making some strides in healing, Wash does on occasion still give up on bedrest and sneak out of his room in search of distraction. That said, he's been better about staying put, but sometimes he just can't handle the silence of the room and the lack of anything to do but think. Sometimes he still needs to get the hell out of there.

His absences may be noted by any who are even slightly familiar with his schedule, as he has to take a break from his usual routine in most cases. However, he can, on occasion, be found in various places throughout the ship. Most notably, the mess hall. Guy's still gotta eat, no matter how fucked his body is, right? Sometimes he stops by the training room to watch anything that might be going on there, or even go to the gardens just for somewhere quiet to walk. Wash may not look like the most friendly person to approach, and for what it's worth, he's really not. The grumpy look that seems stuck on his face permanently isn't likely to disappear should someone stop to talk to him, but he is at least unlikely to ignore a person and keep walking? ]


( consider the last prompt something of a wildcard; feel free to bump into wash wherever around the ship! if you'd like to plot something with me though, i'm always available through pm or on plurk at notcrazyokay! )

Comments

[soldiergenes]

[ "Well-versed in not being able to push through it." Snake reflects on that as he leans back on his hands. They've probably all been in that situation, but he can tell that there's more to that story, and it's gotten to a point where he'd like to dig deeper into some of Wash's vaguer comments. They've fought side by side now, and that makes them as close as two soldiers can get.

He watches Wash's hand on his torso like a hawk. Maybe it would be better to start with what happened here on the Moira. It's something recent, fresh in Wash's memory, but maybe not as personal as some of the horrors he dealt with back home. ]

It won't kill you, but it will slow down your recovery. [ It's hard to ignore how much he sounds like a lecturing parent in that moment, which forces Snake to sigh to himself. He's gotten too old for all this, hasn't he. ]

It'll help if you have a distraction while you're resting. [ Since no one can be expected to sleep all the time, but being stuck in bed limits you to reading or talking. ] So how'd you get your ribs broken? [ Wash had wriggled out of answering that question during the Caducan attack, but things are relatively calm under their new captain, at least for the moment. If there's any time to talk about it, it's now. ]

[hatesimprovising]

[ Though Wash scoffs at Snake's words, he does unfortunately make a good point. And slowing his recovery is the last thing Wash needs right now. That's what happened all through the previous month, and now that things are quiet for once, he should be taking the opportunity to rest as much as possible.

...He just can't stand laying still. Can't stand being stuck alone so long with his own thoughts. Hell, he can't even just sleep his way through the healing process. Sleep is not his friend and hasn't been in years.

As Snake adds that a distraction will help, Wash opens his mouth to respond with something to the effect of there being no distractions, but shuts it immediately as the other man continues. ...Ah. There's that question. The one he thought he'd been safe from after it never came back up after the battle against the Caducans. ]

You're going to distract me by asking me about the reasons I'm stuck resting?

[ It's critical, as is the quirk of Wash's eyebrow, but behind the words, he's trying to think of a way to get out of answering. ...But he can't exactly get up and walk out, and no doubt Snake will ask again later, or keep pressing. He's been holding on to it for this long, hasn't he?

There's a pause, then a harsh exhale and Wash looks away, focusing instead on some random point on the floor of the room. ]

Long story. I got into a fight with Tex, and she's... [ Really Complicated. ] ...She was the top agent in the program we were in.

[ Basically, he didn't stand a chance. He'll just leave the why they got into a fight out, because that's...what makes the whole thing a long and complicated story. Also somewhat embarrassing, since he'd been the one to start antagonizing her where it really wasn't necessary. ]

[soldiergenes]

[ Sorry, Wash, but Snake knows how to strike at the least expected moment, and that applies even to uncomfortable lines of questioning. He can practically feel the way that Wash squirms under it, but he'd asked for a distraction and this is what he's going to get. It may not be the kind that he wanted, but he'll have to put up with it.

As Wash searches for a way to answer, Snake pushes up from his bed and heads over to his storage crate where he keeps his guns. He'll need something to keep his hands busy while they talk, so cleaning his guns is as good a way to do that as any. It's something he does near-obsessively, but a gun can never be too clean.

Tex. The name is only vaguely familiar, but all it takes is a few swipes of his finger on his MID to bring up the directory. He finds Tex's photo and lets out a quiet "hmm" of acknowledgment before returning to the task of pulling out his guns. ]

Infighting, huh? Does it have to do with something that happened back where you two come from?

[ Now that they're doing this there's no reason for Snake to relent. Much like his namesake, once he gets his fangs in he doesn't have any intention of letting go. ]

[hatesimprovising]

[ Once Snake is on his feet, Wash's eyes are on him, watching his actions. Of course, as he heads to the storage crate, he knows exactly what's going on. He's been roommates with Snake long enough to know how much he cleans his guns. Hell, Snake cleans them more often than Wash cleans his own, and that's saying something. ]

Sort of. ...Not really. [ A beat. ] It's complicated.

[ And he's not so sure he wants to get in to those complications, given they're far more complicated than anything should be, not to mention a touchy subject on their own. Eyeing Snake for a long moment, jumping to the conclusion that he's planning to settle in to clean his guns while they apparently talk, Wash heaves another breath and starts petting the first of the cats to make it up onto his bed as a distraction. From his distraction. ]

I may have said and done a few things that she didn't appreciate.

[ In that he'd been intentionally antagonizing her with his intimate knowledge of her and who and what she is that he shouldn't have but does. ...All done out of spite because of the way just seeing her brings up all those memories and feelings about her that aren't his. And really, that's just the beginning of the Thing between him and Texas. ]

[soldiergenes]

[ One of the things that Snake likes least about their room's setup is that there's only one desk for all three of them. They've made an effort to keep it clear so that any one of them can use it when they need to, but it would have been nice to have his own. All the same, he settles down at the desk with both his lethal and non-lethal handgun so that he can get to work.

At least he's at such an angle that he isn't going to be staring Wash down the entire time that they talk. That should make the guy a little more open to answering Snake's questions.

Or... maybe not. That's a lot of hedge words, and Snake sighs to himself as he picks up his SOCOM to start taking it apart. ]

You're making it sound a little like you deserved it. [ He's reading between the lines, but if that's what he has to do, then so be it. ] And all of your other injuries are from the outpost? [ Snake's gaze flicks to Wash then, eyes narrowed as he keeps watch for any sign of lying. ]

[hatesimprovising]

[ Of all the things that Wash is not good at, answering questions with details that aren't pertinent to whoever asked the question is definitely near the top of the list. He doesn't share more than he needs to. He doesn't trust others with details, and if it's personal, why elaborate? From his experience, anyone who expresses concern in him doesn't necessarily mean it. He's been stabbed in the back too many times to believe that any concern is genuine. No matter how well he knows someone. Or, in Snake's case, how long he's known someone. ]

...I probably did. To an extent.

[ To be fair, that's something he won't admit anywhere else. So, maybe he at least has some sort of trust in the fact that Snake won't go off talking about anything he hears in here.

The mention of the outpost has Wash tensing on instinct. That place had been... rough. He's been through things plenty more traumatizing than anything he experienced there, but that doesn't necessarily mean it didn't still cause some level of trauma. Being captured, sold, beaten, and forced into fights that had him killing people who didn't deserve it affects the psyche, no matter who you are and what you've experienced in the past. ]

Most of them. Some are from the fight with the Caducans. I didn't get a lot of time for them to heal before... whatever happened, happened, and some of us ended up on the outpost.

[soldiergenes]

[ The admittance from Wash is begrudging, which is reason enough for Snake to believe that it's true. The words don't fall out of his mouth with ease, the way that they would have if he was lying. To an extent, though. Which means that some of the fault lies with someone else.

So between this fight with Tex, the Caducan attack, and then the outpost, Wash really hasn't had any kind of break. Snake would think he'd be eager to get some rest after all that, but neither of them are really wired to relax. Hence why he's cleaning guns while they talk instead of just taking it easy. ]

Sounds like you could use a drink after all that.

[ Unfortunately, the ship's alcohol supply has been limited ever since the bar disappeared, so it's not like Snake can even offer Wash anything.

With the SOCOM dismantled, Snake uses a cloth to clean each individual component. ] The stuff that happened on the outpost, you ever been through something like that before? [ People like them, they can't just talk about normal things, because their lives are nowhere near that. Any deeper conversation they have is also going to involve treading into some uncomfortable territory. But after sharing a room for over half a year, Snake thinks it's probably time. ]

[hatesimprovising]

Tell me about it.

[ God, could he ever use a drink. Or six. Something to put him at ease for just a while and something to help him not think about it all. He's so tired of thinking. Tired of everything, really.

With that grumbled response out there though, Wash shifts himself carefully--part for his own sake and part to avoid bumping the cats--and lays down on his bed rather than just sitting on it. He hates to admit it, but it's about the only way he can be close to comfortable while he's healing.

Snake's next question has him pausing. ...So, they're talking now, are they? This is no longer just about the last month and how he wound up in his current condition, is it? Wash isn't entirely sure how he feels about that. Not answering questions like that, anyway. But he can't deny that he's had his own curiosity about Snake, just never asked because he knows perfectly well what it's like to be asked about your past and he's pretty sure that like him, Snake doesn't care to get into it. He's not answering any further questions without asking his own, though.

There's a brief silence while Wash wrestles with his lack of want to answer, and then how to answer that, exactly, but eventually he finally speaks again. ]

Not exactly like that. But I've had to kill people who didn't necessarily deserve it before. Sometimes under false pretences, and sometimes out of necessity.

[ And plenty of the situations have been 'him or them' kind of circumstances. Just never in an arena and for the entertainment of others. ]

Why, have you?

[soldiergenes]

[ There's got to be someone on this ship who's making moonshine or rotgut. Snake might even look into it, see if he can get a hold of something and bring it to Wash. It's not like Wash himself is in any state to go hunting down a drink.

That can wait until later, though. Wash hasn't completely shut Snake out yet, though he also wants this conversation to be reciprocal. It's understandable, and Snake doesn't particularly mind. This is what soldiers do, after all, they share war stories. Because those are the only kinds of stories they can share.

It immediately goes into difficult territory, but Snake can't complain when his questions are to blame for that. There's still a moment of hesitation as he slides the cloth over the grip of his gun, but eventually he speaks. ]

I guess my answer is pretty similar to yours. I've never been paraded around like that, but I've been put in situations where the only option was to kill someone.

[ Sometimes they deserved it, sometimes they didn't. But there had definitely been instances where it was the latter. Venom's presence here is a constant reminder of that.

Snake looks away from the SOCOM and over to Wash, quietly relieved to see that he's now actually laying in bed. ] Was it through that program you were in? Did they give you orders you didn't agree with?

[hatesimprovising]

[ If Snake can find any kind of alcohol somewhere on the ship, Wash sure won't turn it down.

In the silence that hangs when Snake hesitates, Wash remains patient. It's not as though he has anywhere else to go or anything else to talk about, plus... Well, if there's anything he gets, it's being reluctant to talk about your history. He doesn't even like talking about it with the people who already know exactly what happened, so sharing it with someone completely unfamiliar with all of it is hard.

The answer does come, and he nods. That's the only response he needs to offer-- there isn't much more to say. They have similar experiences, and that's hardly surprising. ]

You get used to getting orders you don't agree with when you're a soldier. [ Whether you actually followed them or not depended on what kind of soldier you were. ]

Try they lied to us about who we were fighting and why. Kept us in the dark on any details that might have been troubling. We thought we were fighting Insurrectionists, but in actual fact they weren't, and we were the bad guys.

[ A tight, bitter smile settles across Wash's mouth for a moment. Ah yes, remembering how he'd been manipulated. How fun. Scoffing, he moves a hand up to nudge affectionately at the cat that has come to settle on his chest, eyes darting in Snake's direction for a few seconds. ]

So yeah, mostly through that program.

[soldiergenes]

[ Well, fancy that.

Maybe part of the reason that Snake had put this off for so long is because he'd known it would be something like this, that their stories would be far too similar for comfort. Then he'd be forced to dig deep into his past and dredge up memories that he's spent a lot of time and consumed a lot of alcohol to suppress.

Then again, Venom showing up here yet again had already done that. ]

I've been there. There was an organization that was working in the shadows to manipulate me, too. Even sent me to kill someone I thought was someone else, and I only learned the truth when I got here.

[ Snake's hands move quickly as he speaks, putting his gun back together piece by piece. Once he slides the last component into place, he wraps his hands around it for a few seconds. Strange, that even now he finds a comfort in holding onto something like this.

With a sigh, he sets the gun down and meets Wash's gaze briefly. ] Did you get the hell away from them, at least?

[hatesimprovising]

[ Maybe it's a bit of a surprise to learn that he and Snake have even more in common than he'd initially thought. It's not a surprise that lasts long, however-- Wash has the feeling there are probably too many people willing to manipulate soldiers for their own uses, and Snake's story doesn't do much to sway him in another direction.

That question, though. Did he get away from them? It's laughable. In fact, he actually laughs--it's just a huffed breath, but one can practically taste the bitterness that rolls off of it. ]

Not really. I was the last agent left behind--everyone else escaped a few years ago, but I... I didn't. I couldn't.

[ After Epsilon, he'd been declared 'unfit for duty' with his psychological break, so he'd had to heal from that under Freelancer's care... Everything after he'd been returned to the field had been a mess, though he'd mostly stuck around with the program in order to plot revenge. That, and he didn't exactly have anywhere else to go. ]

I shut them down, though. Destroyed one of their facilities and a lot of their technology. But that got me arrested and thrown in prison, so I don't think even that necessarily counts as getting away.

[ That, he bets is an issue unique to himself. Eyeing Snake, Wash figures the guy had to have gotten away from his organization. ...Though, if he only learned the truth when he got here, maybe not. ]

You still with yours?

[soldiergenes]

[ Oh, Snake knows that kind of laugh all too well, and he wishes that he didn't. Still, for Wash to be the only one left behind? Something must have happened. Something bad. Especially if the other people in his program had more or less abandoned him.

As much as he might want to ask, Snake doesn't want to push too hard and Wash has actually been much more open than he had expected, so he decides not to try his luck. He grabs for his M9 now that the SOCOM is done and starts to dismantle it.

When the question is tossed back into his court, Snake shakes his head. ] No, I got away from them a while back. I just work with one other person now. We're still working on taking them down, though, so it sounds like you're ahead of me.

[ Snake's efforts are likely to get him killed if he's not careful, so he could end up even worse off than Wash by the time that he brings the Patriots down. If he does, but he finds that kind of thinking to be unproductive. ]

So... the last you remember from back home, you were in prison?

[ Funny how little they know about each other still, but Snake's starting to get a clearer picture now. He's guessing that Wash found out about the program's true nature during that time he spent in cryo. ]

[hatesimprovising]

[ Maybe he's being more open and honest about things than he'd ever normally be. It isn't without reluctance to be so, and there's still a hell of a lot that he's not sharing, but something about this is easier after learning that his circumstances are surprisingly similar to Snake's. Far from exactly the same, a great many differences, but... far more like one another than he'd ever anticipated.

Watching Snake doing his gun maintenance make Wash's fingers twitch with the urge to do the same, or just something that isn't laying here in bed, talking. He continues to try distracting himself by busying his hand with scratching the cats behind the ears while he listens to the other man speak. ]

Hopefully you come out of it in a better place than I did.

[ Without nearly bleeding out from a bullet wound to the chest, placed there by someone who had once been a friend and teammate. Without having said former friend being sicced on him by the man who used to be his boss. Without having to erase a bunch of AI who didn't deserve it. And, of course, without ending the whole ordeal by ending up in prison.

Odds are that unless Snake dies, he'll get out of his situation in better condition. Then again, Wash had been fully prepared to die at that time, and he still wonders if that wouldn't have been better for him. ]

Yeah. Brought back here straight from my cell. Not before I got a possible way out, though.

[ Or before he found out he'd been betrayed yet again by people he'd put his faith in. That had been a great video call... ]

This organization that manipulated you... What were they using you for, anyway?

[ Even now, he still hasn't got a clear idea of the kind of work Snake does-- or did when he was at home. No idea of his field, his specialization, nothing but the suspicion that he does a lot of stealth missions, after that incident with hiding the bodies during the Caducan battle. ]

[soldiergenes]

[ Snake makes a non-committal grunting noise because he's all too aware that his current mission might end up with him dead. It's something that's probably going to take years still. He may have gotten some information on the Patriots, a disc with names on it that he keeps tucked away here in this very room, but there's nothing to be done with it now that he's here on the Moira. And for all that he knows, that could just be another dead end.

Still, at the moment he's in better shape than Wash, if the guy's still stuck in a cell back home. Not that Snake hasn't been there too, although his imprisonments have all been fairly short-lived. He's never been a POW, not in the same way as Miller or even Liquid.

While Snake could ask Wash what he's going to do to try and break out of prison, it probably isn't that relevant. Not to mention that Wash has another question for him, and this is one that's going to take a little more work to answer. Snake leaves the M9 half-dismantled as he shifts in his seat and faces Wash more directly, resting his forearms on his thighs. ]

As a killer, essentially. I was sent in to take someone out without knowing who he really was and only ever found out the truth later on. Then I had to kill the person I thought was really behind things... but I didn't realize I was still being controlled. I had to go through my best friend to get to him. After that, I was manipulated into almost helping to launch a nuclear strike, but that one we were at least able to reverse.

[ Snake leans back and crosses his arms over his chest, raising an eyebrow at Wash. Sorry you asked yet? ]

[hatesimprovising]

[ Not sorry he asked. Hard to be sorry when it's kind of nice to find out he's not the only one who's been through shit. It sucks that Snake had to deal with any of it, of course, but Wash isn't complaining about finding someone he can actually kind of relate to on some level. Here he thought no one like that existed.

He doesn't appear remotely affected after hearing about what Snake was made to do, though he does at the very least make a bit of a face at the part about the near-nuclear strike. That's rough, but at least it had been caught. It'd be a much bigger regret if it hadn't been. ]

Alright, that's pretty bad. I never came close to launching any nuclear weapons.

[ It's tempting to ask if the people Snake killed were completely innocent or not, but Wash opts against it. Ultimately, it doesn't really matter that much; he killed them under false pretences, and that's always difficult to handle, regardless of the truth. If you're going to be ordered to kill someone, you deserve to know why you're doing it. ]

Good thing you caught it where you did. Moving on after killing someone for something they didn't do is one thing, launching a nuclear strike... I don't know that there'd be any moving on from that.

[ That's just a few too many lives to ever be okay with taking under false information. ]

[soldiergenes]

Yeah, especially since I was sent in there to stop it.

[ Ultimately, that's what Snake did. It's why his legacy as some kind of legend lives on even now, even when the Patriots have tried to brand him some kind of criminal. Neither Venom nor Big Boss had been innocent either, and if Snake hadn't gotten involved in putting a stop to their plans, more lives might have been lost.

Snake tightens his jaw and continues on. ] It was all a huge setup. [ Because isn't it always? ] I thought I was putting a stop to things, but instead I was just playing into their hands. Luckily I had someone there on my side who wanted to stop it just as much as I did.

[ And so his partnership with Otacon had been born.

With that story done, Snake shifts back to the desk and continues working on the M9. ] But hey, I guess for you being stuck on this ship beats being stuck in a cell, right? [ Snake knows it's not that simple, but he's interested to hear what Wash says about it anyway. ]