thisavrou_log | august overflow log

That actually gets a smile out of him. It's certainly better than being asked to elaborate on anything.

"Not really much messier than I'm used to. Just different sorta mess."

He crosses his arms and leans his forearms on the edge of the window, resting his chin on them in a manner that looks incredibly childlike on him.

"Mess is just easier when you got the right people around."

She can't argue with that. Her own mess was always better when Booker was around. No doubt one of the reasons she created him in her mind when things got to be too much.

"And I'm guessing they're not around right now." If he's laying in the backseat of a car and dealing with his own mess alone... This would be the point where Elizabeth would ask if she could do anything, but it's not what she wants to say at that very moment. She's tired, she's got too much on her shoulders, too much frustration and fear.

"My 'right person' isn't around either. He wouldn't know what to do, but I'd like it if he was just... here." She'd feel safer.

Her guess has him nodding in agreement. Even if he was moping with Party here, he doubts Party would let him mope about anything for long.

"Mine always knew what to do. Now I gotta be someone else's right person and I don't got all the answers like he always did."

He's not supposed to be the leader. Suddenly it went from having three other adults who would always have his back to just him and Girl and he can't lean on her like she's older than she is. She's smart, but she's still a kid and it's his job to protect her.

"You think maybe the Ingress'll bring us our people some time soon?"

Elizabeth nods vacantly. "That's about how I feel right now. With the whole crew." These people have come onto their ship, it's dark and cold, and however unreasonable the idea that everyone is looking to her for answers is, that's all she can think. They're looking to her because the captains all gave up command, and she vocally refused to. So what now, DeWitt? Stand on your words and nothing else while the crew struggles with the rationing?

"If it starts working again?" She imagines that given the way the question is phrased, he's in a boat similar to her own-- his timeline is no place to go back to, and he'd prefer his people came here. "I hope it gives you yours, but mine... he should stay where he is. He has a daughter to take care of."

Kobra can't help his little smirk. "Our daughter's here with me, but she's used to having more dads than this."

And really, Kobra's not used to being the only parent by a long shot. It's been a lot of stress that he hadn't felt when all of them had been together. "Thinkin' I could really use the help, you know? She deserves more 'n I can really give."

That feeling of inadequacy has been fueling a lot for him. How can he give her everything she needs when he doesn't know how? Half the time he feels more like another kid than a real parent to her.

Funny, Elizabeth never really thought of him as the paternal type. Sure most of her impressions of him had been formed over the network, and she'd characterized him as immature, impulsive, and foul-mouthed.

So really, given her father is exactly the same, it's not a huge jump for her to make. She folds her arms and leans her hip against the car.

"Are you sure you're not giving her enough? Or are you just deciding that it must not be enough because it's just you and her?" Booker no doubt didn't believe he deserved another chance. Guilt, and failure, and desperate and drunken choices hung over him and his conscience, and had led them both to the trecherous path of just trying to make it right. Elizabeth wishes that Booker would consider them mistakes he learned from, but she knows him. He'll feel that guilt for the rest of his life, probably, but all that Elizabeth cares about is that he came back for her. He was young, he'd made a mistake, and when given the chance to fix it, even knowing he could be killed, he did it.

"I don't have any children of my own, adopted or otherwise, but I know personally that sometimes what a parent thinks their child deserves and what they actually need are two different things."

"Dunno." Maybe she's right, but it's a hard pill to swallow.

"My brother always knows the right thing to say. He raised me, too. Sort of." Sure, they're only a few years apart, but they'd been on their own for so long that Party had acted as a sort of de facto parent in Kobra's life. "Feels like I just fuck it up more than I help, though. "

Elizabeth tilts her head a little. It sounds like this is coming from somewhere, some event.

"Did something happen with you and her?"

He purses his lips. "I made her cry. You ever make a kid cry? It's fucking horrible."

It broke his heart, really. Knowing that he'd been the one to make her feel like that. If it had been anyone else, he would have punched them and he'd been half-tempted to just go ahead and punch himself.

"...I did, yes." She'd done a lot worse to Sally, that poor girl, besides make her cry. But the memory of it would haunt her for a long time, and maybe that punishment fits the crime.

"Did you apologize?"

"'Course I did. Doesn't undo anything." The idea of not apologizing to Girl seems insane, which in itself is a testament to how much he loves her, because he doesn't tend to give a lot of apologies. There's not much he's done that he sees much need to feel bad for, because he's never killed a man who didn't pose a threat to them and he's never threatened anyone who didn't have it coming.

"But it's something. It's a start," Elizabeth points out. "Better than walking away and letting someone else deal with her.

"All I'm saying is... none of us are perfect. I'm sure some of us like to think we are but, no one is. Sometimes, even close friends have arguments, and it doesn't always end the friendship. It teaches you something about that other person, and you become closer."

august overflow log

Elizabeth

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