"By the end of Hard in Hightown, almost every character is revealed as a spy or a traitor."

[neverheardofhim]

Who: Solas & Varric [Closed]
When: Sometime in March (continued from here)
Where: Ingress Complex.
What: Angry dwarf gets mad at not-so angry elf.
Warnings: Varric sans Chill.


[There's something about Solas' calm demeanor, even in the face of an angry dwarf with a wicked crossbow, that set him to grinding his teeth. He fixed a glower on the man, fist clenching and unclenching. If not for the height difference, he might have risked punching the man square in the jaw. It wasn't as if his magic could hurt him -- one of the many charms of being a dwarf.]

[Aside from the whole "unable-to-punch" thing.]

[But getting into a knock-down, drag-out would be detrimental here. Nor did he think that the stubborn, stoic elf would make anything of his attempts. Things would only go back to the way they were, arms behind his back, head bowed, and thinking nothing of the world he was on the verge of ending.]

No, why would you apologize for getting the people I care about killed. As long as what you care about is being made right.

[The idea of Solas even so much as getting near Hawke set his blood boiling anew. While he might have been able to keep his cool in regards to Solas and him, Hawke was and always had been something of a weakness. He stepped forward, boots brushing Solas' own feet. Maybe it would have been menacing given a few more inches, but as it is... the attempt was probably just a little pathetic.]

You're not stepping foot near Hawke. Not if you want to keep your spine intact.

Comments

[dirth]

[ As far as Solas is concerned there's very little reason for him to let any kind of emotion overtake him - Varric is angry enough for the both of them and he keeps his head held high, watching with a careful intensity that he doesn't bother trying to hide. He wants to learn more about this place and while Varric isn't offering much right now... He's prepared for the opportunity to dig and nudge and find out more as soon as he can.

It doesn't feel as cruel as it should, trying to take advantage of a hurt man, but Solas is long beyond such desperate empathy. He has been forced to ignore it, to stand taller, or he would have faltered long before now.

The threats don't scare him - Solas could turn Varric to a statue in a moment, make him a true Child of the Stone with a flush of his power and a blankness in his eyes - but he does listen, curious. The suggestion is there, clear as day - Solas had caused the death of someone that he cared about, and he can't imagine any specifics other than Hawke. Hawke had survived and travelled to the Grey Wardens, however, and Solas is... Concerned.

Wondering. Interested. Curious. ]

I have no reason to engage with Hawke. I think you and I both know that my contact with the Champion was limited at best.

[ Dirth ma, harellan. Ma banal enasalin. Mar solas ena mar din.

The chill of the Nightmare, feeling the Fade around him once more, beyond the Veil and further, as if he could reach out and touch it - that is when he had last truly spoken to Hawke. Perhaps it was not the same for this Varric, as the world was not the same for the Lavellan here. ]

[neverheardofhim]

And I'm not giving you a blighted reason to try it now.

[It wasn't that he was worried for Hawke's well-being in a fight. Facing off against a powerful elf -- an apparent god -- such as Solas would be her biggest stunt thus far, but he wouldn't put it past her. Either of them, really.]

[The problem was, anything related to her own death seemed to shut her down. It wasn't the kind of conversation he'd been able to have with her -- he was too busy cleaning up the damage of simply finding out that she had died. Revealing the details, of the demon she fought off had been an impossible venture.]

[A venture made all the worse, considering the fact that things were changing by the day, of late.]

So what. You're going to destroy the veil and everything with it, just so you can make things right for your people? [A scoff sharp enough to chafe at his throat escaped the dwarf.] I pinned you as a lot of things, Chuckles, but not as a selfish bastard. What about dwarves? Humans? Half the Inquisition, the people that supported you up until you forced them to disband, would be devastated or destroyed, wouldn't it?

What about that?

[dirth]

I didn't imagine otherwise.

[ Varric's anger is not unfounded; Solas had expected it, should he have ever come face to face with his old companions again. He cannot imagine any of them would truly be understanding, not really, and he has no cause to hope for it now. The dwarf is enraged at the very idea of the loss of those he loves most dearly and the Champion was certainly the top of that list. For all that Solas might remember her living and breathing he cannot offer the same knowledge to the man now; it would fall upon deaf ears.

(He is, at the same time, planning to allow her death; was that not the same thing?)

There is no backing down, however. He does not turn away, nor does he allow himself to be cowed by Varric and his rage and his anger. All he does is stand tall, voice low and soft as he speaks, controlled and careful. ]

The world was destroyed by my actions. Countless marvels, lands, artefacts, all torn apart by the choice to raise the Veil. The elvhen people had their lives destroyed by my choice to seal away the Evanuris and I would do anything to restore what was lost, even allow the world we know to be destroyed.

[ He shakes his head, taking a breath. ]

Perhaps I am selfish, but this is my mistake and it is I that must undo the damage that has been done. I take no pleasure in this ending, but it is the path that I must walk. Do not think that I make this choice idly, Varric. If there was another way...

[ Sahlin had begged. He had refused. ]

But there is not.

[neverheardofhim]

[And just like always, Solas was calm and controlled. For a moment, Varric considered lashing out as he had with Neriel not so long ago. He had felled the man easy enough, brought him down to his level. Sure, the dwarf had felt guilty afterward, but in the moment, it felt good to take it out on someone. Surely it would be even better to direct his fists toward someone who wasn't a friend (and also wasn't crippled).]

[But friendship, fantastical as it sounded, was what had stayed both Lavellan and Varric's hands from doing any further damage. There was no love lost between elf and dwarf, at least not anymore, which meant there was little to keep them from coming to blows. Sure, magic couldn't hurt Varric so easily, but usually that was magic worked by mortals. Elven god magic was a bit of an unknown, and he wasn't fond of the idea of finding out.]

The dwarves lost a lot of shit thanks to Darkspawn and Sin, but you don't see me trying to blow Minrathous sky high. [His point, he realized, was probably off the mark, considering the fact that Varric hadn't exactly empowered the Vints himself.]

Guess I'm glad you're here then. At least Thedas has a respite from whatever you have planned for it. [His arms folded over his chest, and he lifted his brows.] And I think Bianca might enjoy your company.

[dirth]

[ There is no reason for him to let any anger or frustration get the better of him - he knows that he is not going to be able to soothe Varric, nor is it likely that he's going to be able to do anything to calm him or settle him. This is the path he had chosen and he had known that he would lose everything he held dear in the process. This wasn't like helping Cole become a Spirit - their arguments about that process had been enough - and he knows it won't be undone by simple discussion. It was going to be a long, drawn out affair, and Solas was prepared to weather it.

He doesn't want to go out of his way to harm someone he might have once called friend, but Solas knows that he is prepared to defend himself. Dwarves were more protected than most but he was prepared for any eventuality - and that meant making sure that he managed to survive to get to the point of drawing down the Veil. He would have to do it, and no one would be able to take that away from him. No one could rip the power from his hands, now. ]

I am sure there is much I could say for your actions, Varric Tethras, but that is not a conversation either of us desire. [ The blight that Varric had allowed to spread across Thedas, uncovering Red Lyrium, the nightmare of it and the trade... He's sure there is more, too, that given the chance Solas could link all the pains of the world back to the actions of this dwarf, but he has no desire to. He doesn't want to mention Hawke, to bring up past guilts, to shame the other man - he wants nothing more than peace, for now, for as long as he might have it.

Solas just turns his head, offering a pursed smile. ] I am not afraid of Bianca and I will return to Thedas. That is not in doubt.

[neverheardofhim]

[There was that feeling of the knife in his ribs, similar to the one that Lavellan had driven in before. The implication that somehow, Varric was a villain in the same rights as Solas, simply because he'd been caught up in a bunch of shit that led to more shit. As if he had planned out what had happened in his life meticulously in order to do... whatever the hell red lyrium had accomplished.]

[Accidents of circumstance didn't necessarily need to be forgiven, but they sure as hell didn't need to be condemned or classed as the same as someone who was going to deliberately destroy the world as everyone knew it.]

[Once more, anger sparked inside of Varric, but he swallowed it down. Easy as it might have been to kill him and get it over with, he didn't know how death worked here. For all he knew, it would simply send Solas back home, free to do what he wished as he wished.]

[Like it or not, he needed the elf there.]

You know, I've been here almost five months, Solas. What makes you so sure you're going to be make it back there?

[dirth]

[ If there was a time for shame Solas had long moved beyond it; it haunted him, of course, and he could feel the weight of it on his shoulders, but he had dreamed and hoped for too long. He knew the mistakes he had made and he knew the things he had done, just as he knew what must be wrought to undo it all... And he could not survive if he did not let himself walk forward and take the only option left to him. He had studied, researched, dedicated himself, and this is all that was left. This was it.

It didn't matter if Varric didn't approve, if Sahlin chose to turn her back on him, if all the companions that he had once held dear chose to try to end his life. He would overcome it all, rise above it and drown himself in the sorrows - but in the end it would result in his mission being completed.

That knowledge, that strength in his spirit, is what keeps him together, even now. Thedas feels further and further away each and every second that passes, and all Solas wants is to reach out and feel the Fade - but he cannot. He wishes he could return, he wishes he had the power, but... He does not know how to do it. He has not learned that yet, but he will.

It's a little difficult for him to fight back the smile that crosses his lips. ]

I think there is much that I know that you may not, Master Tethras.

[neverheardofhim]

I'm sure you do. [Solas might have been holding back his own smile, but Varric didn't bother. A bitter grin split his lips. Oh, he was certain the elf could go on and on about his own timeline, about the people he was so desperately trying to save. But Solas was new here, unable to understand the world in which he occupied.]

I'm certain if there was a way out of here, one of the other mages would have found it.

[His chin jutted upward, grin becoming sharper by the moment. It was like he had thought before, Solas being here meant for the moment, Thedas was safe. Varric could swallow his pride and suffer the elf's present if it meant knowing that his home was safe in the end.]

You know. I hope you have a great time here. There's people who've been here for years -- I hope you get to be one of them.

[dirth]

[ There is nothing in Varric's smile that causes Solas much concern or pause; he has too much confidence in himself, in his path, in what he has chosen to do. This is merely a sidetrack, a mistake that he had no part in, one that he will work to overcome and figure out. It doesn't matter to him if a dwarf thinks that, somehow, he has the high ground - because he can see into a future where the world is good and grand again and he can barely handle anything else.

For all that he might be able to be confident, cocky, dramatic, Solas tucks it away. Now is not the time, and he must allow himself a chance to find a means of learning. ]

Perhaps they would have. Perhaps not. You do not know all their thoughts and secrets, Varric, nor do you know mine.

[ For now, Solas considers this conversation done. He shifts, moving forward, content to make his way through and away from the dwarf. ]

I hope that you never return to Thedas. I would prefer you entertain comfort before my plans come to fruition.

[neverheardofhim]

[The dwarf wasn't sure if he was meant to be comforted by Solas' words or not. As it was, he was content to let it be, content to let the conversation come to an end.]

[The sentiment, though, the hope that Varric be away from the coming destruction, did bring something to mind -- something he'd almost forgotten. When he and Lavellan had spoken about the other elf at length, he'd the last words they'd exchanged.]

[Now more than ever, the concept bothered him.]

You told Lavellan that you hoped to be stopped, Chuckles. Why?

[dirth]

[ The problem was that Solas does not entertain the idea of bringing down the Veil out of some kind of sadistic pleasure - he doesn't want to do it; he doesn't want to ruin everything, to see the world he has come to care for be destroyed. He has seen countless people suffer and lose so much and his dream was freedom - for everyone, for everything, but he realises that it's not always possible.

Frowning, he hesitates, looking down at Varric before he tries to gather himself.

Var lath vir suledin.

I wish it could.

He frowns, trying to settle himself down, to face this properly. ]

I take no pleasure in what I must do. If there was an alternate way... But there is not. I have searched longer and harder than anyone.

[neverheardofhim]

You never had me to try and stop you. [He kept his tone low, the same threatening voice he'd used before, but this time it felt wrong. This wasn't like the enemies he'd fought before, this wasn't Corypheus seeking all encompassing power, nor Meredith and her blinding red rage.]

[This was a man trying to do what he thought was right. It was closer to the Qun in Kirkwall, simply doing what they believed their fate called them to do. It didn't mean he forgave it, he was still disgusted at the whole thing, just as he was disgusted with the Arishok. But at least there was a rationale there.]

[It was more than he expected at the end of the day.]

Mind yourself down there, Solas. There's a lot you won't be expecting.

[dirth]

You are correct, I did not. I don't think it will change as much as you hope. [ Solas is, after all, a man on a mission, determined to make sure that he can do everything within his power to undo his mistakes. He failed and, so, would be forced to walk the path of death to make sure that he was able to fix the world - make it go back to how it had once been.

He is not afraid of Varric. He is not afraid of anything the dwarf might think of, may do, in order to stop him. He has had people rise up against him before and none have truly been a threat; he simply lives through it all and continues, rising higher and fighting harder each and every time.

Solas is more than willing to admit that Corypheus was a mistake and the way that the Inquisitor was dragged into it... He regrets that, too. But he does not regret the pains he has suffered, because it is all for a certain reason. He simply has to accept the way things are now. ]

I am sure I will learn, Varric.

[neverheardofhim]

Always were the smart one. [Varric shrugged.] Guess we'll see how you do.

[There was little more that the dwarf could say or do. Stopping Solas by force was out of the question, and words were clearly having little effect. They were talking themselves in circles, and all it was only serving to frustrate Varric. Perhaps it might have been worth it, if Solas were feeling the same way, but the man was nothing if not an enigma.]

[For now, he would simply let it be.]

[Without another word, Varric turned on his heels, aiming for the nearby EN-Line station home. He had a lot to consider, but first he needed to see Hawke. With his future-past coming back to bite him in the ass, he needed to go make sure that some things were still the way they should be.]